A Phenomenal Woman

Posted by random olio

I am sure a lot of people are writing and sharing about Maya Angelou today, yesterday, and in the coming weeks. She deserves the fanfare. A stellar woman, with so much poise, brilliance, and badassness. The Internet is buzzing with her quotes, thoughts about her life, and how she inspired millions upon millions of people in the course of her life. I love, love, love her last tweet:

Listen to yourself and in that quietude you might hear the voice of God. 11:43 AM – 23 May 2014

I wonder what was going through her thoughts, if she was coherent, if she was so closely talking to God. Regardless, she shared such wisdom with the world, and we are all the better for it.

One of my all time favorite Maya Angelou poems is: “Phenomenal Woman.” In case you have not read it, it still brings tears to my eyes. I think I first read it in college. It was one of those poems that I instantly memorized and often has come back to my thoughts. I often wonder if it was the first time that I actually thought about the idea of a woman being “phenomenal.” Sad, but true. Here is the first verse, but I encourage you to click the above link and read the entire poem.

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.

I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size

But when I start to tell them,

They think I’m telling lies.

I say, It’s in the reach of my arms

The span of my hips,

The stride of my step,

The curl of my lips.

I’m a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,

That’s me.

I only hope that we can continue to raise our girls to know they are phenomenal — whatever their age, background, or disposition. Here is also a past blog post with another favorite Maya Angelou quote.

Happy Mother’s Day, Sis.

Posted by random olio

For many years after my mom was gone, my sister was like a mother to me. I loved and hated it about her. She is older, so it was natural for her to step in and be the older, wiser sister, and I often resisted it. We fought a lot, which often ended in tears. Yet we also laughed a lot, which also ended in tears. I did not want to be mothered, and yet we both in our own ways, wanted to be mothered. We wanted that connection of family. There were ebbs and flows of times when we yearned to have our own family. We always had different individuals in our lives that were an inspiration to us, maybe not mother types, but individuals (yes I did not say women, because mothering can come from a man too) who gave us the mothering that we needed.

Each year as Mother’s Day comes and goes I have to say it is a strange day for me. It has been 20 years since I saw my mom’s face, held her hand, or gave her a hug. I have lived more years of my life without her than I had with her. Some years are tougher than others. On years when my sister and I lived in the same city, we would often have a sister brunch on Mother’s Day. Other years, I just go about my day as though it is just any other Sunday in May.

This year, my sister became a mother. Sunday will be the first Mother’s Day for her as a mom. While Charlie is too young to dote on her mom, I hope my sister cherishes the day. I hope she remembers that while she has had extremely less sleep, and most likely not much of a life in the past few months, it has all been worth it. I know she will say it has been.

Love the hell out of that precious little baby. Enjoy every moment as a mom. I only wish our mom could be with you on your first Mother’s Day, she would love the crap out of, lil Charlie.

Happy Mother’s Day, Sis.

OOBAJUBAWOBBLES

Posted by random olio

So I was recently thinking of a summer while I was in college. I was a camp counselor, and I had the most hilarious camper. She somehow had been taught (or made up herself) that breasts, boobs, whatever you want to call them were “oobajubawobbles.” Oh what fun the counselors had with that one (after hours of course). If only I could remember each word she had for the size. She had a different word for flat to massive. Normal size was oobajubawobbles, extra-large were super oobajubawobbles…the list goes on.

Ah, the fun and randomness of little ones. If I remember correctly she was in elementary school. Talking about oobajubawabbles made her laugh so much, so I did not mind. Even if we were really talking about breasts. I love that something that happened 15+ years ago brings a smile to my face, and a chuckle. I do not remember what she looked like, and I do not remember her name, but the word was so different that the story has never left me.

As someone who can get excited while talking, thus talk fast and often smooshes words together I have a fun time thinking of all the strange words I have made up over the years. Chris and I often find we make up words that only we know and understand what they mean. We use them in public, or sometimes awkward situations and we both can communicate without those we are with understanding the meaning of our words. So maybe it is not just kids that say the darndest things.

In case you were wondering there are no search results on google.com for: oobajubawobbles. Maybe today we can make history. Share this blog post and let’s see if we can make it findable on google. For that little girl who could not stop laughing about oobajubawobbles.

#oobajubawabbles

I admire you Madison Kimrey

Posted by random olio

Madison Kimrey is a 12-year old girl. If all of us had the guts and bluntness Madison had at the age of 12, the world would be a better place. Madison wrote a letter to Phyllis Schlafly, who is an outspoken activist and is against modern feminism, and the Equal Rights Amendment. This is an excerpt from her letter to Phyllis Schlafly that especially resonates with me:

“At a time in their lives when they should be free, independent, and exploring and preparing for the possibilities they have in the future, many of them are worried about getting or keeping a boyfriend. There are young women my age who are extremely smart but they hide it because they get messages from women like you that if they are too smart or successful, boys won’t like them. They get messages from women like you that pleasing a man should be their number one goal. You’re contributing to making young women uncomfortable when they go bra shopping because they’ve learned to analyze every choice based on what other people will think instead of having the freedom and confidence to choose what’s best for them.”

Hell yeah, Madison. I do not think I could have said it better. Seriously. Spot on.

The funny part is that while Madison is speaking to her 12-year-old age range, it never stops. This excerpt from her letter could be read about 25 year olds, even 35 year olds. Her mention of bra shopping is to find a commonality with Phyllis and she uses the analogy of bra shopping to relate specifically to her. We all come in different shapes and sizes, and we all should have the choice to find the bra that unique fits us and our lifestyle. She says: “Equality doesn’t mean women will all make the same choice. It means women will be treated the same no matter what choices they make.” I may have had a paper route, sold thousands of boxes of girl scout cookies, took care of my mom at the age of twelve, but I could never have eloquently went off on a conservative political activist.

Be sure to click the link above to read her full letter. Think of it as taking the time for feminists today of all ages. You are a badass, Madison, and I hope parents all over share your letter with their daughters. May they learn from you.

Let me take a SELFIE

Posted by random olio

Spotify has made its way into our life. We use it at work, it plays in the kitchen while Chris cooks, or when we clean the house, and I have even used it when I cannot find anything I like on the radio while driving. The other day at work, I had the Top 100 hits on Spotify and it was cycling through different songs, and a new one came on I had not heard before. “#SELFIE” by The Chainsmokers. It is hilarious, and also a bit disturbing. Even so, it caught my attention immediately. Partly it is the beat and rhythm that keeps you interested. Well in that one-hit-wonder kind of way. When you really start to listen to the words, you might think differently. Here are a few:

Did you think that girl was pretty?
How did that girl even get in here?
Do you see her?
She’s so short and that dress is so tacky
Who wears Cheetah?

Can you guys help me pick a filter?
I don’t know if I should go with XX Pro or Valencia
I wanna look tan
What should my caption be?
I want it to be clever
How about “Livin’ with my bitches, hash tag LIVE”
I only got 10 likes in the last 5 minutes
Do you think I should take it down?
LET ME TAKE ANOTHER SELFIE

A selfie: a photo taken of oneself to post onto a social network. The self-portrait of our times, but one that is shared with a few people to millions or even a billions of followers (depending on who you are). I wonder though, why has it created such a phenomenon and almost cult following? Is it that we want to be seen, tell a story of what we did that day, however interesting or boring it may be, or are we becoming full of ourselves? I do not know the answer. Sure I have been known to post photos of myself, and sometimes they are selfies, but to what extent are we virtually (and I meant that literally) showing off? As the lyrics state: “I only got 10 likes in the last 5 minutes.” Is it more about how many people see us and like, comment, or whatever, or is it more about ourselves and the story we want to tell?

What do you think? Watch the video to enjoy a little dance party on your Friday.