postaday

Is there always a silver lining?

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Does everything have a silver lining? If you are a glass half full kind of person you might think that there is a silver lining in everything. Maybe it is all in how you approach a situation. You could have a frustrating experience with a friend or family member and choose to look at it for all the things that might be negative or wrong, or you can choose to look at it as an opportunity.

While we cannot change another person, and often we cannot change a situation, we can change how we look at the situation. Is it a moment to stand up for what you believe in? Is it now the time to say what you are really thinking? Or is it a time to stay quiet and let the other individual(s) work it out on their own? Maybe you are the type of person to always fix things for others, and maybe you have to take a break from that and let someone learn in their own way.

I think we can be in strange situations many times in our lives. Maybe we are stuck in a job we hate, or have struggled to tell a friend that we no longer want them in our life. Whatever the situation, the silver lining is often what we learn, and what we do not know. For example, you could hate your job, and struggle to understand why you keep interviewing but continue to not get the job. If that is your situation and you are reading this right now, you might say, “Tami you are crazy, there is no silver lining.” The silver lining is what you learn: more patience, persistence, perseverance, and maybe even the people skills to put yourself out there, to dig deep and fight for where you want to be. Not everything we do in life is easy.

Is it time to find the silver lining?

“What My Mother Gave Me”

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I wonder what my mom would think of me today. If we could have a conversation, what would she tell me? Would she say she was grateful that I have been given many opportunities, maybe many more than she ever had? I just finished reading “What My Mother Gave Me: Thirty-one Women on the Gifts That Mattered Most” Edited by Elizabeth Benedict. It has many short vignettes from different women who are authors and journalists, who share the gift their mother gave them. Some of their mothers are still alive and others have lost their moms. I related to some, and did not have the experience of others. Ann Hood was one author that made me think and ponder about my own mom:

“A mother’s love is like that. I know this now that I’m a mother. We give our children the best of ourselves so that they can find the best of what is in them. The day I rejected the gift of the white suit, I got the best gift of all. My mother let me know that I had finally become that person I’d dreamed of becoming: a girl who spoke her mind, who was independent and opinionated. A girl who knew who she was and what she wanted. A girl who would not wear an all-white pants suit. And by recognizing that, she gave me permission to go into my own mismatched future. What a gift.” Page 59

While my mother never had the opportunity to see and spend time with me once I found my voice, I hope that when I was a kid I was as feisty as I am now. My sister I suppose could attest to that. Or maybe that came later in life. I do know that I now speak my mind, am definitely opinionated, know who I am, and usually know what I want. So after finishing “What My Mother Gave Me” I wanted to figure out what I would say about what my mother gave me.

It is a tough one for me. I really have no material possessions from my mom. The only things that allow me to remember her are what are left of our family photos. She must have been off cleaning and taking care of us, or she was the one taking the photos, because she is in very few of the photos. The gift my mom gave me was taking care of people. I watched her do it. Whether it was the children in her at-home day care, or older women at church, my grandma, us kids, her classroom at school, neighborhood children, she was always taking care of someone. Chris often reminds me that I need to take care of me first before extending myself so much. After reading this book, I realized that was the gift my mom gave me.

What about you? Do you know the gift your mother gave you?

Addicted to Electricity

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Yesterday I am running on the treadmill while Chris is riding the bike. I am 5.5 miles into my run and I start to shoot off the back. I realize that the lights in the garage go dark, and the tread is instantly slowing to a stop. The power went out. I go inside to see if it is just the garage or the rest of the house. It is the entire house. Chris starts to investigate if it is just our house or if others are affected. He called Portland General Electric. 60 customers had already called, and 240 were effected. In the five minutes it took to call the Electric company, 59 other individuals had already called. Amazing how fast we respond when something is taken from us.

I am dripping with sweat. I want to keep running, so I grab my phone and head outside to finish my run, hoping that when I come back it will be back on and we can proceed with our day. I come home and the house smells amazing with black beans, sausage, and eggs. I am curious how Chris made food, without the electricity. He said he lit the gas stove with a lighter, and presto, a yummy breakfast. I am still sopping wet with sweat, and want to take a shower, but do not want to use all the hot water. I begin to contemplate over breakfast what we can do today without electricity.

I tell Chris: “We could research the items on the list and just chill on the couch.” He says: “No electricity, no wi-fi.” Ugh. Bummer. I continue to mention different ideas. We could run errands, and go to the grocery, but we do not want to bring home cold items if the electricity does not come back on. We would also have to figure out how to manually open the garage door. So frustrating. Yet, it makes my mind wander.

We take so many creature comforts for granted. Electricity to power a zillion things: our computers, wi-fi, televisions, charge our phones, our refrigerators and stoves, hair dryers, air conditioning (a dream for our home), the list goes on. So I can definitely say to you today that I am addicted to electricity, and I need to appreciate it more. In the era of instant everything, we forget all that goes into getting it to our front door. It was an eye-opening reminder for me to not take it for granted.

So…I am going to show gratitude for electricity today. #thankyouelectricity

This girl kicks ass.

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This video is making it around the Internet this week. I love it. Long live aunt flo! How easily I can remember fourth or fifth grade when we had “sex ed” and learned all about aunt flo. If only we had such a bad ass video at the time to feel empowered about the changes that were about to or were happening to us. I most vividly remember a video we watched on a film strip about finding out you had your period for the first time, and the emotional foreshadowing was of such gloom. Will anyone find out? Will the boys know? Who cares.

I only hope this video will empower girls to feel fierce, free, and normal about their period. The video below is called: “The Camp Gyno.” It is from a company called: “Hello Flo.” Such a clever idea to help girls acclimate into the world of womanhood. You will laugh, I promise you. This girl is hilarious, she takes getting your period to a whole new level. One of my favorite lines is: “It is like Santa for your vagina.” Be sure to check out the blog on their website. There are some fun and clever videos, and content that demystify “the period” for a girl.

This could mean a menstrual revolution. Bring it on!

Words that make you squirm

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Moist. Moist. Moist. It does it for me. It adds many grotesque images to my thought. Yuck. Yuck. Yuck. Hole. Crevice. Crotch. Pus. The list could go on. Why, oh why do these words give us such visual images in our thoughts? Why do they cause us to cringe and vomit in our mouths? Maybe it is the connotation of these words. Many of them have to do with body parts, discharge, leakage, etc. They do not bring great visuals to thought (more of the excrement variety) yet how have we become so tainted with visuals?

Recently I found this blog about the word moist and I laughed hysterically. Such a great post sharing all the different nuances for “moist.” Moist cake, damp, wet, the list goes on. But worst (yes, worst of all) is when I hear someone say, “moist panties.” I know it is a joke. I know it is just to mess with me, but it makes me quiver with disgust (even if I do chuckle a bit inside). Not what you expected in a random olio blog post? Well it is random, and it does happen, sometimes you just have to think of the stuff that goes unsaid. Yes, I am the one that just says what is on my mind.

This “Guardian” article mentions a few other words that make folks grossed out, but none of them really make me shudder. Phlegm does not bring the best visual to mind, but that is only after reading David Sedaris recent book “Let’s Explore Diabetes with Owls” where he talks about the nature of phlegm in China, where it is everywhere — the subway walls, streets, you name it. His description is hilarious. So much so, that I read it out loud to Chris to see if it resembled his experience during his many trips to China.

I guess it all depends on what era you grew up in, as this NPR article lists moist, phlegm, and slacks as the worst words ever. Slacks? Seriously? It is not the 1950’s. My grandma abhorred wearing slacks until her final years, as though it was a sin to be able to just be comfortable, right? I guess I will have to create a better word for moist, since I live in one of the moistest climates in the US, and there are days and weeks that it is never dry. While we do not have that gross, moist, humidity, it seems like that word is just part of the Portland vernacular.

What words gross you out and leave visual imprints in your mind?