I have a post-it on my computer screen that says:
“You lose all your control when you lose your temper.” Author unknown.
I do not know where I read it, or who might have shared this idea with me, but it is a good reminder on those tough days when continuous curve balls are thrown your way. Whether it be the angry driver you encounter on the way to work, the woman who cuts in front of you at the grocery store with an overflowing basket, or the customer service agent who was curt and short with you, anger is at times hard to hold back.
For me, I find that at times my anger comes to the surface when I do not feel heard. It can happen with friends, a spouse, family, a stranger, really anyone. Their intentions might be 100% pure, but they might be distracted with their own issues, and the result makes me feel invisible.
A thought came to me the other day. For every situation where I want to react and get angry with an individual, I need to take that frustration and respond with the same love and care that I wanted all along. I will give you an example: If Chris lets me know he will take care of something for us, I then check it off my list of To-Do’s and expect he will take care of it. If I find out later that it was never handled, it might set me off, and make me feel ignored. Instead of reacting with anger, I could respond with how his actions made me feel, and what it means to me when he follows through on his promises. Yes, these are just tiny instances, but each little experience is part of a larger picture. Rather than reacting, stay in control, and share how you feel.
What do you do when you lose your temper? Why do you lose it?