Ideas

Childcare = cost of mortgage?

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My sister shared this article yesterday and I had to share here. Maybe the topic is close to my thought as I listen to what my sister and friends have to go through to ensure their newborn, infants, or toddlers receive quality, educational, and appropriate care while they work to support (or share in the support) their families. Depending on what city you live in, for some cities (especially larger ones) that requires both parents to work in order to pay their bills. And, that can even be before having children. Once you add children into the mix, costs only increase exponentially.

The article she shared: “What Stalled the Gender Revolution? Child Care That Costs More Than College Tuition” discusses the cost of child care. It can range anywhere from $1200 a month to $2100 a month. Childcare can be similar or twice as much of some families mortgages, and that can be for one child. If you have two or more young children it can increase even more. How do these families make it work? How about families that are lower-income and do not make enough to cover their bills and childcare?

It reminds me of my recent blog post: “We are in last place” that discusses maternity benefits in the United States compared to other countries. Do we at all value women, mothers, and the place of families? We give little to no “time off” to bring the little one into the world, and then when a woman decides to go back to work, or has no choice, the costs can be mind-boggling.

Please read the above article. It is well written on the conversation that needs to happen on affordable childcare. I know I was in the dark on the topic, and only when it impacted people close to me did I better understand the depth of the need.

Random recipe: Roasted Maple + Goat Cheese Carrots

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I have already blogged this week about New Year’s resolutions. I do them some years, other years I feel ambivalent about it all. The blog I posted earlier in the week was about goals versus resolutions. For 2015, I decided to not make resolutions but find out what was missing in my world, and find ways to bring them into my life. I know that I want to find more time to be creative, and recently came across a concept called #yearofmaking. The idea is to make something everyday. To me that feels complicated, and yet you could take a photo every day and be “making.” I do not want to “make” just because I have a goal to do so. So instead, what kept coming to me is that I would like to jump-start our meals. I often find new recipes to make and then it will be weeks or months until we actual try them (if ever). I want to have a plethora of dinner ideas (and dessert too) and be excited to make them again if they are hits. Lately we have been having the same things each week.

What am I going to do about it? A goal. We are going to try a new recipe each week and I am then going to share how it went on random olio. Chris and my food adventures. I do not want to carve out more than that as life is busy in all honesty. If it is a dinner option Chris will probably be making it (you do not want me to cook) and if it is a dessert option I will be the one in the kitchen.

The first recipe of the year: Roasted Maple + Goat Cheese Carrots. I am not a fan of cooked carrots. I will eat them in soup or stew, but usually I would rather eat them raw with hummus, or veggie dip, or on a salad. Cooked carrots are not really my thing. Until last year. At a local, freaking amazing restaurant (OX) we had a side dish of carrots. Once I had them, I could not stop talking about them. Over the last year we have tried different versions of trying to recreate this carrot dish, with boring, not even close results.

Until last week. Yes, Chris did it. He figured out the missing ingredient. All the recipes we found were to steam the carrots and he decided to roast them instead. The result: the most amazing carrot dish. I keep asking if he will make it.

Roasted Maple + Goat Cheese Carrots

Ingredients:
7-8 regular sized Carrots, sliced (I love when we use the colorful kind: yellow, orange, purple…)
1/8 cup Maple Syrup
1/8 cup Olive oil
Sprinkle of Kosher Salt

Mix everything together in a cast iron pan, and roast in the oven for 15 minutes at 400 degrees. Once the pan is taken out of the oven, sprinkle desired amount of goat cheese on top of the carrots, and enjoy!

Let me know what you think of each random recipe!

Middle of night ramblings

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I think I should write a book in my sleep.

Occasionally (Chris would probably rebut that comment and say often), I talk in my sleep. He thinks it happens when I work too much and have tons and tons of information coursing through my mind. Yet, the most recent occurrence happened around the holiday, when my brain was mush, and there was a tiny fraction of thoughts flowing in my head. My recent middle of the night rambling:

1:45 a.m.
[Tami rolls over in bed.]

T: Put them in a pile. Put them in a pile in the middle of the floor.
C: Put what in a pile?
T: The sticks that are meant for play. I think I know what I’m talking about.
C: Ok babe.

Chris has learned it is best to agree with me in these moments. We have been married for 11.5 years. He has learned over time about my late night babble. It is like an alter ego comes forth via my subconscious and I can snarl, cuss, and disagree. Since everything makes sense in my unconscious mind while I sleep (it does for everyone, right)? Early on in our marriage I would talk and he would find it fascinating and ask me questions about my babble, if he disagreed with me I got a bit aggressive back at him. For example: if he said you cannot put sticks in a pile, I would snarl and get confused and frustrated as to why not.

Over time he realized that I would wake up in the morning and have no remembrance of our conversation, what I was talking about, or my reaction. He decided he would just agree with me. So if I said there are sticks coming out of my head, take them out. He might say something like: “okay, I did, is that better?” Agreeing meant that I could babble all I wanted, but not have to process why it was not logical or made no sense (thus last week’s ramble).

My husband is a saint. I think he should start to write down all my middle of the night ramblings, and we can compile and publish them together. A coffee table book?

Not a fan of resolutions

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I started with the title: “Why I hate resolutions” but I decided to change it. Why? Well, whenever I hear the word “hate” I think about my dad who always told me that hate is a strong word, and that I should not use it. The funny thing is I am sure that he used it whenever he wanted, however, somehow whenever I use the word, he comes to mind and I wrestle and wonder if there really is a better word to describe what I am thinking.

So…this year I am not going to do resolutions. I am going to have goals. Instead of sharing my specific goals (I may do that soon) I want to share my thoughts around sticking to your goals:

  1. Do not have others talk you out of your goals. I have had that happen. On different years I have made goals to read a certain number of books in the year, or write everyday, or run a certain number of miles. There are some people in your life that think you have carved off too much. They might think that you work too hard or too much and that you should chill out. For those that understand your goals and what you are really trying to accomplish, they will not try to talk you away from your goals. They will support you, challenge you, and psych you up on the toughest of days. Watch who talks you away from your goals.
  2. Stay resilient. Do not give up. It is easy to tell yourself how tired you are, or how hard you worked that day. I think of my goals pertaining to running. While I have never run a marathon, I have done a half marathon, and I think about the days after. Do you never run again or do you give yourself a break and then once you have had the rest needed to recuperate, you go back out and run? Are you back at it, or once you hit your goal do you give up?
  3. Have a support system. Maybe it is one person, or a group of people. For me it is my husband. He often knows when I have hit my limit, but I am usually not willing to call it quits for that day. I have a hard time giving in if I have not done my goal for that day. He barters with me and will say you can catch up tomorrow, and remind me that today I just need to take care of myself (most especially on the roughest of days).
  4. Stay motivated. My goals sometimes fall over a calendar year and sometimes they fall over many years. I recently found a calendar that showed that after some intense health issues, I had started walking a mile a day (that was in 2006). Now I am running 6-8 miles a day. It did not happen overnight, and it required small, mini goals to just stick to my mile a day. Over time, I craved my run however long or short it was, my goals changed, and my life changed as a result.
  5. Decide what is most important. I could have a long list of what I want to focus on. Or, I can prioritize what matters most to me right now. My motivation lately is to try to find balance in my life. That is not something that happens overnight. It is not something that just happens in a calendar year. It happens moment by moment in the choices I make. It is a priority for me.

What do you think about sticking to your goals?

You + Me

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We are sitting in the kitchen, finishing lunch. Chris has Spotify on while making lunch and we continued to listen as we finished the last bites of some amazing steamed and roasted veggies. A song came on and my eyes opened a bit wider. I have been in a bit of a music rut, and while we always have Spotify playing in the speaker in the house, it is rare that I get up to find out who someone might be. This time though I ask Chris to email me who it is. He tells me the artists are called: “You + Me.” Interesting name, and like I often fashion my handwriting e.e. cummings style, I also have a thing for + signs between words, oh and ellipses, and um ampersands.

In any case, as we finish our veggierama meal, we need to get dressed to head out to a friend’s house and as the song winds down, I say: “I really love her voice, she sounds a lot like Pink.” We get dressed, head out, and come home late and fall into bed. The next morning I look at the email Chris sent and am reminded of the song I liked so much and decide to research the band. The singer that sounded like Pink? It is Pink. Alecia Moore aka Pink teamed up with Dallas Green (love that name), a Canadian from the band City and Colour, with an acoustic album that came out in October 2014 called: rose ave (maybe they were channelling e.e. cummings)?

The song I heard via Spotify was called: “You and Me.” And in my normal relentless style, I proceed to listen to their entire album. I am hooked and wanted to share. Their other popular song is called: “Break the Cycle.” The few videos I found online show Pink entirely clothed. That seems to be quite a different trend for her. I am used to seeing her with barely anything on hanging and twirling down from the ceiling. Regardless of what she is wearing Pink is a badass. It reminds me of that actor/actress that you see in many different genres and they never play the same character. Each time they act they show you a different side of them, a reminder of their true talent.

As I listen to You + Me, I feel like I am on a farm, sitting on a southern porch swing, watching the wind blow. I am relaxed, and I feel at home.