I subscribe to Portland Monthly magazine, as well as their email newsletter. Last week I received this email.
Seriously? 10% for cosmetic breast procedure booked in March. Definitely offensive to me. A good ad, but it disgusts me. What has this world come to? Does it make sense that I am offended?
Yesterday at work a few of us lady folks somehow got to talking about bras and breasts. I find it always to be a fascinating conversation (I am sure some men might find it fascinating too, but in different ways). One of the main reasons I find talking about bras, breasts, boobs, breast reductions, breast increases so interesting is that we all come in different shapes and sizes and we all have such different and rich experiences from puberty to adulthood.
AND…I believe that most of us are not wearing the right sized bra. How can we really know with sub par service and support? I have two places in Portland that have real knowledge about bras: Nordstrom and a local bra store that cater to women who are pregnant or breast-feeding, women who have had a mastectomy, or women that have a strange size (28D to 56K) – yes those sizes really do exist. Most department stores like Macy’s do not carry the correct bra size, and even Nordstrom at times has had to order my size.
A C cup size was average when I was growing up, and anything larger meant you had big boobs. I can remember a few years ago watching an episode of Oprah dedicated to bra makeovers. Here is a photo gallery + explanation of some good examples. So often we are wearing a band size that is way to large and we sag way more than necessary. A 34D might better fit as a 32E or F (depending on if the bra is a European bra). Just as this Empowher article says:
“D is small, G is average, N is off the charts, so if you think you are a D, you are probably a G. Most DD’s end up as a G or H cup when fits properly.”
The article also mentions that only 15% of all women are wearing their bra correctly. I am part of that small minority. I would pay good money to have a bra that feels invisible, is comfortable, does not hurt my back, and is not atrociously ugly. Often the ones that are attractive are also not supportive. More and more there are boutique shops that are popping up and carrying more accurate sizing. There is chain of stores called “Intimacy” that assist with bra fitting, however we do not have one in Portland. It is a good name for a bra store, as it is an intimate experience to have someone measuring + sizing your wobbly top half.
So, do you know if you are wearing a D but really should be sporting a G?
So I was recently thinking of a summer while I was in college. I was a camp counselor, and I had the most hilarious camper. She somehow had been taught (or made up herself) that breasts, boobs, whatever you want to call them were “oobajubawobbles.” Oh what fun the counselors had with that one (after hours of course). If only I could remember each word she had for the size. She had a different word for flat to massive. Normal size was oobajubawobbles, extra-large were super oobajubawobbles…the list goes on.
Ah, the fun and randomness of little ones. If I remember correctly she was in elementary school. Talking about oobajubawabbles made her laugh so much, so I did not mind. Even if we were really talking about breasts. I love that something that happened 15+ years ago brings a smile to my face, and a chuckle. I do not remember what she looked like, and I do not remember her name, but the word was so different that the story has never left me.
As someone who can get excited while talking, thus talk fast and often smooshes words together I have a fun time thinking of all the strange words I have made up over the years. Chris and I often find we make up words that only we know and understand what they mean. We use them in public, or sometimes awkward situations and we both can communicate without those we are with understanding the meaning of our words. So maybe it is not just kids that say the darndest things.
In case you were wondering there are no search results on google.com for: oobajubawobbles. Maybe today we can make history. Share this blog post and let’s see if we can make it findable on google. For that little girl who could not stop laughing about oobajubawobbles.
#oobajubawabbles
random olio 