intimacy

Yesterday at work a few of us lady folks somehow got to talking about bras and breasts. I find it always to be a fascinating conversation (I am sure some men might find it fascinating too, but in different ways). One of the main reasons I find talking about bras, breasts, boobs, breast reductions, breast increases so interesting is that we all come in different shapes and sizes and we all have such different and rich experiences from puberty to adulthood.

AND…I believe that most of us are not wearing the right sized bra. How can we really know with sub par service and support? I have two places in Portland that have real knowledge about bras: Nordstrom and a local bra store that cater to women who are pregnant or breast-feeding, women who have had a mastectomy, or women that have a strange size (28D to 56K) – yes those sizes really do exist. Most department stores like Macy’s do not carry the correct bra size, and even Nordstrom at times has had to order my size.

A C cup size was average when I was growing up, and anything larger meant you had big boobs. I can remember a few years ago watching an episode of Oprah dedicated to bra makeovers. Here is a photo gallery + explanation of some good examples. So often we are wearing a band size that is way to large and we sag way more than necessary. A 34D might better fit as a 32E or F (depending on if the bra is a European bra). Just as this Empowher article says:

“D is small, G is average, N is off the charts, so if you think you are a D, you are probably a G. Most DD’s end up as a G or H cup when fits properly.”

The article also mentions that only 15% of all women are wearing their bra correctly. I am part of that small minority. I would pay good money to have a bra that feels invisible, is comfortable, does not hurt my back, and is not atrociously ugly. Often the ones that are attractive are also not supportive. More and more there are boutique shops that are popping up and carrying more accurate sizing. There is chain of stores called “Intimacy” that assist with bra fitting, however we do not have one in Portland. It is a good name for a bra store, as it is an intimate experience to have someone measuring + sizing your wobbly top half.

So, do you know if you are wearing a D but really should be sporting a G?

Yesterday I woke up after a strange dream and had many thoughts instantly come into my head that had nothing to do with my dream. What a strange way to wake up on a Sunday morning. The following is what came into my thought. Good thing I have a pen and pad of paper next to my bed…

There never seems to be enough time in the day to accomplish all that needs to get done. There are usually too many lenses to look through, and too many things to focus on. Often we are juggling too many things and it means we cannot focus well on any of them. The same goes for people in our lives. I am a fan of having fewer close friends, than many non-close acquaintances. The more individuals we have to devote our attention to, the less depth we can give to others.

It is like being at a large party or a big wedding. How many times have you been to a wedding, and never really had the opportunity to connect with the bride or groom? Was it because of the large volume of people the bride/groom have to attend to on their wedding day? Did you feel more like just another body attending the event? Many times at large events, the more individuals that are involved, the less intimacy and connection happens.

Depth is lost by more numbers.

Just like when you take a photo of a large group of people, you cannot zoom closer in with the lens to include everyone, you have to go further away. I crave smaller, closer connections. I would rather zoom in than out, and allow for greater connection and intimacy.

Thoughts on my random morning wake up brain dump?