negativity

Lately I have been thinking about what drains me in life. The bright light I keep being led to is: negativity. Now I am not going to tell you I am a perfect angel. Yes, I get negative and frustrated and the world does not always look bright and shiny. When I speak of negativity I am thinking more of the person that is consistently negative. I do not want them in my life. I do not want them in my house. I do not want them Sam I Am. Sorry I got a little Dr. Seuss on you.

We all have someone in our life that sucks us dry, takes, and complains, and we have to work hard to find our equilibrium again. Why do we continue to allow this to happen? Sometimes we do not have a choice. They could be a client, vendor, family member, friend, or co-worker. We might have tried to share our thoughts and opinions while the other person remained defensive or could not see our point of view. What do we do when that person continues to drain us?

I believe that we all have a choice in how we approach our day. We have a choice to how we are going to respond. Sometimes it is not always easy to stay positive and kind when our day might be throwing us curve balls left and right. But you know deep within if it is your tendency to lead with positive thoughts, happiness, and a smile on your face. You know if you are truly enjoying your life. If you throw out the random bad day, do you approach your life with a glass half full mentality? I hope so. It makes things so much easier.

When others have shared their struggle, I often want to find a thread in the story that shines to all the goodness, gratitude, and wonderful things they have going for them. There is usually always a silver lining. My hope is to cultivate that goodness and nip negativity in the butt. Who wants it around? Not me. What if we tried to lead with the joyous part of life, and tried to eradicate the Debby Downers? Are you with me?

I recently found this great blog: The heART of Living by Emily. I cannot even remember how I came across it. She inspired me last week, and I want to share a quote from her blog post, in hopes that passing on her inspiration will help you as it did me:

“Our realities are shaped around where we place our attention. If we focus on negativity, then our life situations will reflect negativity. If we focus on qualities and behaviors that we would like to invite into our lives, then our life situations will eventually shift to reflect that reality. The difficulty is that often times we are unaware of what we’re focused on. Usually we’re unconsciously repeating habitual tendencies and patterns of thought that have been formed by the way we were raised and our life experiences. By practicing awareness on the yoga mat, in our interactions with others, or by simply observing our own thoughts and emotions, we start to realize where and how we place our attention.”

Recently I have felt bogged down by a few things that have not shifted or changed in my life. I find that in that struggle I can go the route of being negative, and dreading the outcome if things do not shift. I forget that focusing on the negative, or as some might call, the glass half empty, then that is the energy I am inviting into my life and experience. At times I am very aware of my negativity and at other times, I am completely oblivious.

What I need to do is focus on the good going on around me, and not focus on what has not happened. I actually really enjoy focusing on gratitude and appreciating the experience I am in, but there are times when I fear that the choices I have made are having a negative effect on other events in my life. If I move away from fear, and stay in the present, then I cannot get sucked into the negativity. The hope is that by staying in the present, my attention will go to what is happening right now. Where I spend my time, the event, activity, and individuals I am spending my time with will then find me with a glass half full. What we focus on is what we bring into our experience. Even on those rough days, we can take a break, take a breath, and remember to bring a half full, (or hey how about full) glass to the table. When it is full, there is more goodness to share!

What do you think?