Know your voice

Posted by random olio

Your voice. How do you use it? You have to know your own voice, what you believe it, what you stand for, and what matters to you. Once you know your voice, you have to find out how to make it heard. It took me until I was in my early twenties to know what my voice looked and sounded like. Even now a decade and a half later, there are times when it might be strong, but still quivers. Mostly the last ten years have been a time to hone my voice, decide when I am going to open my mouth, and when I will work harder to make it heard.

Recently I came across this article titled: “The Best Designers Bring Their Own Opinions” with such a great quote, I had to share it:

“Knowing your voice—what you believe and why you believe it—and effectively incorporating that into your work can help set you apart from everyone else. There’s very little else that can do that for you.”

What I love about this quote is that it says “effectively incorporating that into your work” – it does not say conversation or meeting, it says work. That could mean how you incorporate your voice into your project, your new product design, your app. It could mean in your artwork, your presentation, or in closing a deal. It could even mean in how you deliver bad news or how you interact with your co-workers. Your voice is a part of you and not something that you can take on or off. It lives in all you do.

At times you might be in situations where you feel like your voice is a quiet flutter and your authentic voice is not strong, loud, and bold. You might not feel comfortable to speak up and put your career on the line, or take a stand with a friend. Over time that quiet flutter will get stronger and louder and our true voice will stand strong. Be ready for it. It will happen.

Stressed Spelled Backwards is Desserts

Posted by random olio

I have been stressed out lately. Lots happening at work. Lots happening at home. Last week I think I hit my limit and decided it was time to shift priorities and re-focus a bit. Then I found this quote, “Stressed Spelled Backwards is Desserts.”

It got me thinking in a deeper way, maybe feeling stressed is not always a bad thing. So often we try to cram every possible moment of our day full of doing things. Accomplish, accomplish, accomplish. Get it done. I know I often do. A full day of work, a good run, a blog post, more work, oh and somewhere in there is a bit of eating (or a lot depending on the day). That does not sound like too much, and yet some days it is exhausting. Last week I had one of those days. I came home and was wiped out. No run and no work was happening for me. I changed into comfy pajamas and curled up on the couch in front of the plethora of television shows I am behind on for some mind numbing entertainment. My dessert after feeling stressed.

My hope is that each time we are stressed out, it gives us pause to slow down. To look again at our priorities and find out how they can be shifted, changed, and balanced. How can we turn our life from feeling stressed to pampering and taking care of ourselves? Is stress really a way for our bodies and minds to tell us that we have had enough? That it is time for a much-needed break? Or that it is time to pull out the desserts, put our feet up and relax a little?

What do you think?

Trust me

Posted by random olio

Why should I trust you? Should we trust people immediately when we meet them, or should they have to earn our trust? Most of the time I give people the benefit of the doubt that they can be trusted, but if they do something that crosses that line that makes them not trustworthy, they will have to work hard to earn my trust back.

Trust is a crucial topic in my life. It is the cornerstone of my marriage, imperative in my friendships, and integral in my daily work life. My approach consists of giving others the space and opportunity to show me who they are, and if they follow through with what they have committed to me, it allows me to continue to be open and transparent with them. If the space and openness I have provided is tarnished by dishonesty, or missed commitments, the relationship becomes more closed. I no longer want to open up or share of myself with them.

Is it so hard, or so much to ask to be honest, and do what you say you will do? In my marriage, that means that we are completely transparent with each other. We say the tough stuff, are blunt with each other, and hold each other accountable to the commitments we have agreed to with each other. It is not always easy, and can sometimes be work, but it is always worth it in the long run.

At work, I know that everyone does things in their own way, and there are numerous ways to handle tasks and projects. I am not worried about how someone goes about a project so much as that they are honest, do it well, and follow through on the commitments they made. Good work, honesty, and follow through to me are the foundation of trust in good working relationships. Once I know that my colleagues meet those standards, then trust comes easy to me. Trust among my co-workers has led to some amazing connections and friendships along the way.

Maybe this blog makes me sound like a bitch, but I have very high standards. Trust is the glue in relationships. With trust, relationships are open and transparent. Without it, intimacy is closed.

Yahoo’s New Employee Policy – Thumbs Up or Down?

Posted by random olio

What do you think of Yahoo’s policy of no longer allowing employees to work from home? I am a bit shocked. I worked from home for over eight years and, I can tell you, I was way more productive than I would have ever been if I was in the office. I will tell you why:

Fewer distractions. I was able to focus on what I needed to accomplish, be dialed into conference calls and meetings as needed, and have the quiet space for the true work I needed to do each day.
No wasted meetings. If I was on a conference call, and the part of the call had nothing to do with my job, I could put my phone on mute and handle other work. When the meeting focus came to my area, I could unmute my phone and participate. That is hard, if nearly impossible, to do when you are in the office.
No time wasted traveling to and from work. I worked longer hours when I worked from home. I also had more “me” time, felt more focused, did not have to waste time on what to wear that day, commuting, going out to lunch. In the end, I was more focused by having my dedicated office space at home.

Working from home is not for everyone. As someone who worked from home and managed a team of employees who also worked from home, there is a respect and privilege that comes from working from home. It means that you do not abuse the unique opportunity for others. I always looked at what I and my team were able to do as trendsetting for the future. If we could make it work, it could mean that others in the future might have the option for a similar opportunity. It also means that the manager has to be aware of what it is like for that at-home worker, and they have to manage differently than you would in the office. You do not have the face-time you have in the office, so you have to be creative in order to connect with employees in different ways.

Based on the experience I had, it shocks me that a company that has already been receiving a bit of a bad rap in the news lately would go backwards in time to not allow employees to work from home. It feels like a decision based on fear. Rather than trusting employees and setting up a system of accountability, it seems like they are removing that trust and bringing everyone back into the office. It is like not trusting your kids to drive on their own when they get a license. Eventually, they have to make their own mistakes and learn from them.

An interesting side note: In the article I linked to above, it says that Mayer (CEO of Yahoo) has built a nursery in her office. Seriously? That will not bode well from a PR perspective. Consumers and customers will roll their eyes and find that just maybe this is all a double standard.

What do you think?

Does Silence Mean Disagreement?

Posted by random olio

For a while, I have wondered, if silence sometimes means disagreement. You are out with friends, or involved in a long work meeting. A friend at the table, or a colleague in your work meeting is quiet most of the time. Are they bored? Do they think most of the conversation is small talk? Why are they not talking? I read an article recently (I wish I remembered where is was) about silence = disagreement. The idea has not left my head. Instead, it has been silently percolating in my thoughts over the past few weeks. It has meant that I have watched interactions with others and when I find someone not speak up, I wonder if they disagree, but have decided to not speak up.

What do you do in those situations? I find that for the most part, I am usually completely transparent and share just what is on my mind. I sometimes wonder if I should keep my mouth shut more. Maybe silence is not always so bad? Does it truly mean that you disagree, or does it mean you maybe just do not care? Or does it mean you do not feel comfortable enough to share their thoughts and opinion?

What do you think? If you are silent in certain situations, why are you silent? Do you always feel comfortable, or is silence a sign of your discomfort? Leave a comment and let me know what you think!