Hiding behind my book

Posted by random olio

I probably should have known when I was in elementary school that I had a voracious desire to investigate, learn, and make connections. Maybe it started with my passion for Encyclopedia Brown books. I made it my mission to try to solve the case and learn about any nuances before finishing the book. That has fueled me for many years to come. I love learning new things, finding pieces of information that are missing in a story, and piecing together how each aspect is interconnected with another.

Books would suck me in. I could learn about the drama, excitement, and sometimes boredom of someone else’s life. I could try to guess what I think the author would do, and if they did not, what I would do if I was the author. Was that just a thing I did growing up? Recently I read a brilliant memoir by Julia Sweeney (think “It’s Pat” on Saturday Night Live), called: “It’s Not One Thing, It’s Your Mother.” I laughed a lot, and was impressed not only with her life, but the humor that came out in her writing. This quote from her book made me think of my own childhood:

“While I didn’t like most of my classes at school, I did love to read, always imagining myself as the heroine in a story. I thought being Anne Shirley, the spunky orphan in the Anne of Green Gables series, might be less stressful than dealing with my father’s moods. I identified with Frances Nolan in A Tree Grows in Brooklyn and her loving but turbulent relationship with her head-in-the-clouds father. But my most recent favorite was Are you There God? It’s Me, Margaret. I was positive I’d get my period any day.” page 36

My sister might have actually read the entire Anne of Green Gables series, but since I was her constant tag-a-long I saw all the movies with her. Since I was more of a Barbie girl, then a get lost in the field and dream about Gilbert Blythe, I still related to the cantankerous attitude of the sassy red-head. There were times when I would think living in that era would be much easier than my own childhood, or joining the group of girls in The Babysitter’s Club would make all my worries go away.

Just as I would hide under the covers with a flashlight so I could stay up reading, or sneak away to another part of the house to try to get out of chores, books were my solace, comfort, and adventure. Whether I hid behind my book, or let my book launch me into the world of detectives, popularity, or the lust of Gilbert Blythe, I was and will always be transformed by those words on the page.

Losing your temper

Posted by random olio

I have a post-it on my computer screen that says:

“You lose all your control when you lose your temper.” Author unknown.

I do not know where I read it, or who might have shared this idea with me, but it is a good reminder on those tough days when continuous curve balls are thrown your way. Whether it be the angry driver you encounter on the way to work, the woman who cuts in front of you at the grocery store with an overflowing basket, or the customer service agent who was curt and short with you, anger is at times hard to hold back.

For me, I find that at times my anger comes to the surface when I do not feel heard. It can happen with friends, a spouse, family, a stranger, really anyone. Their intentions might be 100% pure, but they might be distracted with their own issues, and the result makes me feel invisible.

A thought came to me the other day. For every situation where I want to react and get angry with an individual, I need to take that frustration and respond with the same love and care that I wanted all along. I will give you an example: If Chris lets me know he will take care of something for us, I then check it off my list of To-Do’s and expect he will take care of it. If I find out later that it was never handled, it might set me off, and make me feel ignored. Instead of reacting with anger, I could respond with how his actions made me feel, and what it means to me when he follows through on his promises. Yes, these are just tiny instances, but each little experience is part of a larger picture. Rather than reacting, stay in control, and share how you feel.

What do you do when you lose your temper? Why do you lose it?

Why worry?

Posted by random olio

I recently finished a novel that was a bit odd. I am not sure I can even try to explain the storyline, but it was different enough that it kept my interest. The book was titled: “The Family Needed” by Steven Amsterdam. One of the quotes that resonated with me (even if it was just for the story of a novel) was:

“All I mean is there is no profit in worrying. By the time you get where you’re going, the story will have changed anyway.”

What a great quote for everyday life, and so true. By the time we agonize over what we are worrying about the moment, hour, day has already changed. The story has changed. Why not just focus on the good that is happening right now, and stop worrying about the future? I am one that easily can worry. Will we be safe? Will we have enough money to cover that unexpected expense? What will they think? How will they treat me? Will I be prepared?

There are so many ways we can worry about the future. Whether about a sibling, our job, a child, friend, or parent, there is so much to worry about each and every day. What if your focus and thought was different? What if…you remembered that you had no control over the future, you only have control over right now. You could choose to enjoy the present moment, hour, day. You could choose to have that hard conversation with your friend, or decide to not let their life decisions bother you.

What story will you change, and what story will you let go of today?

Some SF + OAK lovin…

Posted by random olio

I promised you a blog about San Francisco. We spent every waking hour either walking or eating. Why not? It is San Francisco. We spent one day playing in the city, and the second day in Oakland. I had a few favorite places I wanted to revisit on Saturday, and I was happily surprised and inspired by a neighborhood we found in the Mission that did not disappoint.

We ventured to Skunkfunk, and Synergy Clothing – both places I wanted to visit. On the way and in between, we found many other boutiques and design stores that did not hesitate to inspire. I love to see how different neighborhoods and cities showcase their current design tastes. On our way to finding a sweet treat, we stopped at Muji. My all time favorite Japanese pen shop with newer locations in New York and San Francisco. I have a passion for fine tip pens. The ones I purchase from Muji are .38. Hard to find in many places in the states.

Next stop: Kara’s Cupcakes.

Chris and I are cupcake fiends. Whenever we travel, we are always on the lookout for the best tasting cupcake. I really do not care what it looks like, it has everything to do with the flavor. We have our favorite in Portland, but by far the best cupcakes we have found in the states is Kara’s Cupcakes. They were a bit snooty with us, but the cupcakes did not disappoint. I found out on their website that they are opening a location in Monterey, CA this summer. As you can see they did not last long. Favorites of the day? Red velvet, Banana Caramel, and Lemon. Yum. If you are ever in San Francisco, be sure to go to the Marina District and try Kara’s.

On Sunday in Oakland, we made sure to visit one of our favorite coffee roasters, Blue Bottle Coffee. Yes, I know I am boring by purchasing decaf. Leave me alone. Their beans rock. If you want to try them from the middle of the country, you can purchase beans right from their website. They also now have locations in San Francisco and New York City.

We spent a few hours on Sunday walking outside in Oakland. It was overcast, and at times chilly and other times warm and sunny. While out for our long stroll, we saw this biker-come-kayaker. Quite the workout he must have had on Sunday!

While taking a break to rest our feet and get a warm drink, I found this fancy door. While I do not have a place for it in my home, it inspired me. A wine rack/barn/door. A very clever design idea.

A great trip. We are both a bit sunburnt, but had a wonderful weekend, strolling, talking, eating, catching up, and feeling inspired.

Bay area we will see you soon.

Plain cheeseburger circa 1986

Posted by random olio

I spent the weekend with my sister in California (more on that in a future post). On the way to the airport we stopped by an In-N-Out burger. Yum! While sitting outside waiting for our food, she reminded me off my pickiness as an eater when I was a kid. Every once in a while my grandma would let us pick a fast food place to eat. Back then getting fast food was a big deal and even quite a treat. I, however, found mustard, onions, and pickles disgusting (I still kind of feel that way). I guess I held my ground even at a young age when I wanted something a certain way, because I always wanted a plain cheeseburger.

We would rotate deciding which fast food joint we would stop at, mostly it would be Wendy’s, McDonald’s, Burger King, or a local Drive-In called: Burkie’s. (They used to have amazing/real vanilla coke). The funny part about ordering a plain cheeseburger at McDonald’s is that if you asked for a sandwich that was outside the norm (aka a plain version) they would have to make it from scratch. What they would do is give you a plastic cone-esque device with a number on it would go on the hood of your car on the driver’s side. You would then drive out of the drive through into a parking spot and wait for them to bring your meal out to you.

As we were reminiscing about this time in our life, my sister mentioned that I my pickiness was actually rewarded because it meant I actually got the freshest made sandwich. I had never thought of it that way. I am not posting a picture of our In-N-Out meal, because…we’ll there is not one. The second our burgers and fries arrived we were wolfing them down. Then, and only then, did I think about taking a picture.

In-N-Out burger we hope to see you soon.