Don’t be a lady

There are many days where I am not a lady. I often like to think of myself as one who can hang with the guys. I can. Yet, I am all woman. One of my favorite quotes is: “Well behaved women rarely make history.” I like to think that I am one of those women who is not well-behaved. How do I do that? Well I do not like the status quo. I say what is on my mind. I like to challenge others to look at things differently. Sometimes I behave, and sometimes I do not.

Recently I found this quote from a commencement address given by Nora Ephron, where she was speaking to her alma mater, Wellesley, in 1996:

“Whatever you choose, however many roads you travel, I hope that you choose not to be a lady. I hope you will find some way to break the rules and make a little trouble out there. And I also hope that you will choose to make some of that trouble on behalf of women.”

Go Nora. I agree. If you have been reading my blog for a while, you will know that I am a feminist, a strong proponent and supporter of women’s issues. While some may think that women have it all, that we are equal to men, but in case you live in that bubble, we are not. Women still need to work together to speak up against pay inequality, gender bias, abuse against women, the list goes on. As Nora said in 1996, we need to break the rules, make a little trouble, and do it for women.

So I ask you, what are you doing to break the rules? Do you behave, or do you take a stand against gender issues? Do you raise your voice, speak out, and get others out of their bubble? Stop behaving and make history!

#Stopbeingalady

Want to Read: “Present Shock: When Everything Happens Now”

Usually I write about books I have read, but today I want to share about a book I want to read. I just read this NPR book review for: “Present Shock: When Everything Happens Nowby Douglas Rushkoff. His book is about how we are slaves to technology, i.e. slaves to our computers, phones, text messages, etc. I was intrigued by this quote in the book review:

“In my life, it’s sort of the experience of being on Facebook and seeing everyone from my past suddenly back in my present. And the inability to distinguish between who may have been friends of mine in second grade, and people who I’ve met just yesterday, and people who are actually significant relationships. That collapse of my whole life into one moment, where every ping, every vibration of my phone might just pull me out of whatever it is I’m doing, into something else that seems somehow more pressing on the moment.”

How true that is. Our online life tends to instantly suck us into this vortex of what others are doing. Are they successful? More than we are? Less? Are they happy? The constant interest and care of our “friends” status updates has made us a distracted and less focused society. It also seems to be that every email, text, voicemail, Facebook, and Tweet we receive, we are very quick to check and respond to in case we might miss out on something. Do we usually really need to react and respond so quickly? Not usually.

Later in the article Rushkoff says:

“But I think what happens is as we get more and more obsessed with those pings, we lose touch with sort of the continuity of life. We forget what it means to really just be there, looking in someone else’s eyes rather than down at our phone while we’re at a meal. And I guess a lot of what I’m trying to do with this book is to give people permission to take back their time.”

Chris and I usually (depending on what might be happening in life or work), remind each other to put our phones away when we go out to dinner. We are paying to have a meal out, so we should be sure to give each other our full attention. Do we do that at home? Sometimes. I never thought of it in the words: “Take back their time.” It makes me ponder in my thought other times during the day. Do you look at your phone when you are in a meeting? When you are talking with someone one-on-one? While walking to a meeting in a different building? Do you look at your phone when you are bored? Waiting in your car at an intersection? What if we were to take those moments to be quiet? To listen, or to meditate? Would we be happier? Or does checking our phone each time we hear it ding, whistle, or beep make us feel at peace?

Be sure to read the above article to learn more about what Rushkoff calls: digiphrenia

What, what? An unkept Barbie?

Okay, I confess. I was a Barbie girl. You would not find me playing with horses, or GI Joes, I was 100% a Barbie girl. You could bring over your horse or GI Joe, but I would only play if it meant that Barbie would be involved. I do not know if it was considered a lot, but I had about 10 different Barbies, in addition to the townhouse (with string powered elevator) and the hair salon. I was obsessed with changing their outfits, combing their hair, and even gave one a haircut. Little did I know that Barbie’s hair would not grow back like mine always had.

my one saved Barbie

my one saved Barbie

Yesterday when I saw this article on the Huffington Post. I had to laugh. What would Barbie look like without her makeup on? Click the above link to see. In my mind, she looks like an exhausted mom. Even so, I think that Mattel should sell a Barbie without makeup. It would show little girls that women are real, and they are beautiful with and without makeup. We do not always look amazing in the morning, and sometimes we do. Either way the reality should be present in toys that kids purchase. Free of fake eyelashes, eyeshadow, and foundation to cover up moles.

I wonder what it would have been like if my Barbie dolls looked like real woman (even in the way their feet are formed) would I have had a different idea of beauty as I grew up? Luckily I got makeup out of my system at an early age, and eventually formulated my own view of what was beautiful to me, and makeup was not on that list. I know the discourse and dialogue around creating an anatomically correct Barbie doll is old news, but I still think it needs to happen. I wonder though if makeup free, “accurate” dolls were created, would little girls be interested? Have we created little monsters?

Hopefully the trend can be reversed and there can be a happy medium. Instead of Barbie without makeup that looks exhausted and worn out, we could just have natural Barbie that has flat feet, wears her Chacos, looks energized, and maybe just wears lip gloss. Is that too much to ask?

Ants stole my jelly beans

Yesterday I was remembering an Easter Sunday from my childhood. Before I tell you what happened, I need to give you a bit of context. Each Easter we were given three Easter baskets (we knew our individual baskets based on the color ribbon tied on the top). Before we were allowed out of our bedrooms in the morning, my parents (a.k.a. the Easter Bunny) would hide our baskets and we would be set free to go and find our baskets before breakfast. There was also always a “family” basket that sat on the center of the kitchen table.

Easter 2013 egg decorating (w/niece + nephew)

Easter 2013 egg decorating (w/niece + nephew)

Since we grew up in Indiana, it was generally cold outside, and depending on how early or late in the year Easter fell, we might even have snow. Due to the weather, our basket hunt was always somewhere in our house.

This specific year I remember finding my last basket next to a sliding glass door behind a heavy drape. Once I found it, I looked down and noticed it looked fairly black. Bending down to pick it up, I screamed. Not out of fear for what I saw, but because I knew there was no way I would be allowed to eat the candy inside my basket. My basket was covered completely with ants. Gross right? In the ten minutes it took for my parents to hide the baskets and for us to find them, the ants had completely ransacked and attacked my Easter candy.

I was mortified. To assuage me, my parents let me know that for that Easter I would get to share the “family” basket with them. I cannot remember if that was a treat for me, or not. All I can remember is that ants took over my basket.

#tooomanyants

I’ll have what they are having

I cannot help it. Every once in a while I have to go back and watch this video. It ALWAYS makes my day.

I have wondered what it would be like to be a twin. This video is one I know was floating around the Internet for a long time. I saved it. You know for those days when you are slow and you need something to keep you going? Yesterday was one of those days. I was pooped. No energy whatsoever. Watching these precious little ones have their conversation made me grin from ear to ear. What are they saying to each other? I know you have probably already seen it, but hey it is Friday, the end of a month, and sometimes you just need to put a smile on your face before you start the weekend.

Enjoy. Adda da da. Adda dada. Yeah what the ones in diapers said. I will have what they are having! Happy Friday!