Lollipop of mediocrity…

Posted by random olio

Mediocrity. It is not a word I think much about, as I am not much for being mediocre. I am all about driving excellence, doing your best thinking, pushing the envelope, and iterating over time to hone a craft, project, or outcome. I have extremely high expectations for myself, and those in my life. I am not looking to surround myself with mediocrity. So when I came across this Fast Company article this week, and read a quote I had never heard before about Gap’s new CEO, Art Peck, I had to smile:

“The 59-year-old hates classic rock (because “it’s stuck in time”) and has a quote next to his bed framed by his wife: ‘Beware the lollipop of mediocrity. Lick it once and you suck forever’.”

After a quick Google search I found the quote is from Brian Wilson of The Beach Boys. It is a quote that helps to visualize mediocrity. In a lot of ways it is a good mantra to never settle, to always push, to create new ways of looking and thinking about our lives each day. Whether you are a firefighter, a school teacher, a boss, or you are in a job you hate, you always have a choice of whether you are going to come to work each day and be mediocre. What is the point of life if not to change, learn, and grow? How can you do that when you do not try to be a better person, friend, employee, or family member?

While I do not plan to frame this quote by my bed, it is a great reminder to continue to push myself (yes, I know I am already relentless). To never settle, to ask questions, dig deeper, and live my life to the fullest. I already have a very full life, but whenever the naysayers want to talk me down and bring me back to mediocrity, I will be reminded to stay away from the lollipop.

Never settle.

I love you, I love you, I love you…

Posted by random olio

I remember back in the day (about 12 + years ago) when Chris and I were saying our first “I love you’s.” We were both a bit timid to say it after being burned in relationships of the past. I remember the first time he said it to me over dinner in a restaurant in Boston. He said: “I think I love you.” At the time I did not know him well enough as I do today to tease him for that comment (although I tease him about it today). At that moment, I felt those tingly feelings that you feel the first time the word love spews out of someone’s mouth. I did not want to say anything that might make him take it back, because I felt the same way.

The only difference is I was not used to saying those words in my life. They were not often said in my house, and at a certain point my parents were so involved in their own life dramas of illness, poverty, and depression that whether I was told “I love you” or not did not filter into their day as top of the importance list. What I do not remember about that night in Boston is if I said it back, and Chris does not remember either. He was probably in a state of shock that he said those words to me.

Gradually we said it more and more and it became a natural part of our interaction. I think there was probably a time early on where I did not say it too much for fear of scaring him away. Eventually you get over that learning curve and realize how important it is to say what you mean so deeply. We tell each other every day, sometimes many, many times. I chuckled at the end of a work day a few weeks ago. I called Chris to tell him I was ready to be picked up (we carpool) and he said: “On my way. Love you.” I found it funny because I was going to see him only moments later, and yet he said what he was feeling in that moment. That is just the way it should be.

Call me sappy, or addicted or whooped (I am all of those things) for my husband, but I want to make sure that he never forgets how I feel, and I never take for granted that he knows. Saying “I love you” is #3 on a list in this Huffington Post article: “13 Simple Tricks To A Long And Happy Marriage.” I have to say I absolutely agree with the 12 other items on the list and that they contribute to a happy marriage. Especially being best friends, honesty, and cherishing each other.

Remember to say: “I love you” and mean it.

Better than you ever imagined.

Posted by random olio

“It is going to be better than you ever imagined.”

I do not remember when I first heard this statement. I know I was young. Life was not always a piece of cake with ice cream on the side. It is a thought that has always stayed with me and always resonated. It brought me strength. When things were tough when my mom was sick it made me think about days when life might be better. At times I thought, well it cannot get any worse, so it can only get better. Whether you believe in God, a higher power, or the universe, there is a design to our lives that we do not always have control over. When we let go and let the design take shape and happen as it is meant to, we open ourselves up to allow for “better than you ever imagined.”

When I have had trying work situations and it was hard to see to the end of a long tunnel, it brought me hope. Hope. We all have to have it. We can have it on the darkest days, and it can be with us when life is good. Hope leaves us in a place that brings our imagination to what could be, to what is possible. When you are in a tough relationship and it seems like maybe settling is an option, think about how taking a stand for yourself means that the result of your life will be better than you can ever imagine. It does not mean it will happen the next day or the next month, but standing strong for yourself can only result in amazing things.

It has in my life. Many times when I have thought why was I put in this situation? Why me? I have been so good, honest, and did the right thing, why do I get the shitty end of the deal? What I have learned is that sometimes it is not about the hand of cards you were dealt, the person that passed on in your life, the job you lost, the friend who treated you poorly. It is about how you handle that challenge, how you do or do not let it affect you. That is how you grow, and how we open ourselves up to the strength and lessons we learn. And, many times once we work through our hurt, pain, or sadness what we receive on the other end is better than we can ever imagine.

What do you think?

Rain, luggage, and Christmas lights

Posted by random olio

Coincidences. I love when you share something with someone and they say they found that same idea at the same time you did. Last week I posted a blog about a Maya Angelou quote. I was telling a co-worker about the quote yesterday and she told me that she had just shared the same quote with a friend that day. Was it a coincidence or were we both meant to be inspired by this same quote? She then asked if I had read the full quote. Usually I research that sort of thing before writing a blog post, but at the time of writing Thursday’s post I decided I liked the simplicity of that quote just the way it was shared. The co-worker then shared the full quote with me. I was stunned. I knew immediately I had to be sure to share the full quote on my blog. Here is in its entirety:

“I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow. I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life. I’ve learned that making a “living” is not the same thing as making a “life.” I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw something back. I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision. I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one. I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back. I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn. I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
― Maya Angelou

Gosh how many times have you had those days when you feel like you cannot keep going. Whether it be a bad day at work, a day that started out on the wrong side of the bed and for some reason you cannot get over your grumpiness, or you get horrible news that you are not sure will ever have a happy ending. This quote is a great reminder that the day starts fresh when you wake up again, and that you do have a choice to be present each day. You do have a choice to connect with someone else. You do have a choice to share love. The most unselfish love there is, is not asking for anything in return.

What is great is that my co-worker is doing this right now for a friend. I have watched her share unconditional love with a friend in need without asking for anything in return.

How do you handle a “rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights?”