Ideas

Missed moments

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By the mere fact that you are reading this blog it means you are on a smartphone, an iPad, or on your computer. A device that lets you connect to the Internet and go to a webpage. I love all my blog readers and followers, but for today I am going to tell you, read this blog today, watch the video below, and then turn it off for the day, or better yet, pick a day of the week to put your phone away, or a day a month, or if that might be hard for you, start by putting your phone down for an hour a day, and maybe gradually increase that to more and more time.

Some of you might have already seen this video, or it has been displayed on your Facebook or Twitter feed. Regardless I encourage you to watch it again and think about how many opportunities have you lost because you were too busy reading emails, scanning your Facebook feed, sending a tweet, or posting to your Pinterest board? I am just as much to blame. Yesterday I was at a conference and found myself in and out of a distracted mind between work emails, the presentations, and feeling completely out of it. I took ideas away from the day, but what if I had just turned my phone off? How many times are you in meetings and you see the same behavior (yourself or others) throughout the day?

I have written before about Sliding Doors moments, and I wonder if our phone is often that train that means that because our head is down, or our focus is off, that we miss out on important eye contact, fun moments, and maybe worse of all I wonder if our distraction actually makes others not trust us. Do we ever lead people to think that our phone is more important than they are to us? Yikes. There are times when Chris and I will go out to a nice restaurant and have somehow over time built a pact that we are there to be together – aka – no phones.

Watch this poetic way of getting us to realize how many moments we miss each day.

 

Check out my divot

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My grandma loved watching golf. She would watch it most Saturday and Sunday afternoons. Over the many years I spent time with her, and eventually lived with her off and on, I learned quite a bit about golf rules. Somehow though I never played golf. I have been to driving ranges, and played my fair share of putt-putt, but a full round of golf has never happened in my life.

Last Friday I went golfing for the first time. Yes, can you believe it? I had an absolute blast, and so far I might be a new convert. It started out as a gorgeous afternoon and 70 degrees at the beginning of May, what Portlander would not be stoked to be outside? As you can tell by this picture, the sun eventually hid behind the clouds and it cooled off a bit. Still a perfect day for a nine holes of golf. I was with colleagues who were patient and taught me some of the basics (of course so many more things to learn). I now understand a bit more about an iron, driver, and a putter, and I think I quasi know when to use each club.

I even had one or two initial drives down the green. As you can see by the photo of me, not all swings were successful. Actually on most holes I tee’d off quite a few times before I actually hit the ball. The photo shows during that swing that I took quite a bit of earth, aka a large divot. Notice the chunk of mud/grass sitting on my ball. Yes, I may have no idea what I am doing, but at least I played with all power and zest. By the way, do not ask me how many different balls I used (and lost) in the course of nine holes.

I will definitely be visiting the driving range to practice, and would love to venture back this summer. Bring on the sunny days so I can see if the excitement is a short-lived adventure or if it is my new summertime exploration.

Any golf pointers for me?

“I only want to hang with my wife”

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You know when you hear something and you think, “Hell yeah, or right on!” We were watching a clip of Ellen with Seth Rogen and he discusses one of his recent tweets:

“I really only want to hang out with my wife. I just want to watch Game of Thrones with my wife.” -Seth Rogen

10:14 PM – 21 Apr 2014

Um, hell yeah. I am not a Game of Thrones fan, but really this could read anything along the lines of, “I really only want to hang out with my wife [or husband]. I just want to watch [Scandal] or [The Good Wife] or [24] or [insert your favorite TV show]. I love thinking about how diligent we are with specific shows. There are plenty of shows that I would never watch that Chris loves and others I cannot watch for the mere fact that I would never, EVER get the story line out of my mind. This is how the scenario would play out:

I would wake up in the middle of the night and shake Chris and say, “I cannot sleep because that episode of 24 was just too real and is something going to happen at 3:00 AM when Jack does [insert whatever mayhem you want here]?”

Chris would then think something like, “I cannot say, “No.” because Tami does not do so well in the middle of the night when she really is not coherent and when I tell her something is not possible and it does not make sense to her well a lot of expletives spew out of her mouth.” He would then say to me something like, “Jack is safe at home with Chloe. All is good.” I would believe him and then go back to sleep.

So instead of watching shows together that I cannot even fathom watching (because of my never-shutting-down brain) we watch Scandal, Parenthood, Modern Family, The Good Wife, Orange is the New Black, and House of Cards, and I can sleep at night and all is well.

The next morning we will wake up and brush our teeth and say, “Can you believe what happened on Scandal last night?” or “I cannot believe we only have one more episode left of House of Cards, how are we ever going to wait a year to see the next season (you know all in one weekend like the rest of the world).” Is it sad to say that while we are watching our favorite television shows together, curled up on the couch together, that we are in some ways connecting? Yes. We are home together. We discuss what happens. We reflect on the storyline in relation to our own lives. Somehow we feel in a better place and, maybe, the world is in a better place.

Although after all that, the gist of Seth Rogen’s quote is really this: “I just want to hang out with my wife [or husband].” At the end of the day it is not about Game of Thrones, or Scandal, or Orange is the New Black. It is the fact that hubby’s want to be with wives, and vice versa. It is about snuggling on the couch or in the bedroom, toes touching, or legs intertwined, for that moment in time where spouses hang together. Life is never the same. We are never the same.

#lovemyhusband

Bring on the five year old me.

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You know when you keep having a thought in your head, or a word that continues to come to you? Lately that word has been perfect, or perfection, or perfectionism. It has come up in my own life, and at work. Usually folks will say with pride: “I am a perfectionist.” Or they might say, “I am a perfectionist, but I do not look at that as a weakness, it is a strength of mine.” Whatever it means to each of us, the word has been on my brain. Thus, I am not sure why it took me so long to read Anna Quindlen’s book: “Being Perfect.” It is not a new book, it has been around about 9 years. Once you pick it up you can read it in about 15 minutes. All 48 pages are full of black and white photos. To me this is the best quote of the entire book:

“Give up the nonsensical and punishing quest for perfection that dogs too many of us through too much of our lives. It is a quest that causes us to doubt and denigrate ourselves, our true selves, our quirks and foibles and great heroic leaps into the unknown. Much of what we were at five or six is what we wind up wishing we could be at fifty or sixty.” page 44-45

There are times when I think trying to be perfect holds us back from relishing the life we are living that very moment. There are countless times when I have to make something look just right, or finish up that task, or make sure my house is clean before I can do x, y, or z. I have blogged before about how much my surroundings need to be organized in order for me to be creative, but what if that is only the result of wanting things a certain way and, dare I say, that certain way is to have everything in its place? Does that make me a perfectionist?

I am sure there are loads of studies that have already been done about perfectionism. I am not going to look them up. I am not going to do any research. I am also not going to feel bad about who I am or where I like to have order in my life. At the moment it works for me as long as I am aware of what I am doing and I do not let my ways get in the way of potentially missing out on an adventure, or a “leap into the unknown.” Yes, I will have to be quite aware of when I think I am not going to do “that thing” because it might be messy, or because it is something new and uncomfortable.

I am going to embrace the five-year old me. Bring it on!

OOBAJUBAWOBBLES

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So I was recently thinking of a summer while I was in college. I was a camp counselor, and I had the most hilarious camper. She somehow had been taught (or made up herself) that breasts, boobs, whatever you want to call them were “oobajubawobbles.” Oh what fun the counselors had with that one (after hours of course). If only I could remember each word she had for the size. She had a different word for flat to massive. Normal size was oobajubawobbles, extra-large were super oobajubawobbles…the list goes on.

Ah, the fun and randomness of little ones. If I remember correctly she was in elementary school. Talking about oobajubawabbles made her laugh so much, so I did not mind. Even if we were really talking about breasts. I love that something that happened 15+ years ago brings a smile to my face, and a chuckle. I do not remember what she looked like, and I do not remember her name, but the word was so different that the story has never left me.

As someone who can get excited while talking, thus talk fast and often smooshes words together I have a fun time thinking of all the strange words I have made up over the years. Chris and I often find we make up words that only we know and understand what they mean. We use them in public, or sometimes awkward situations and we both can communicate without those we are with understanding the meaning of our words. So maybe it is not just kids that say the darndest things.

In case you were wondering there are no search results on google.com for: oobajubawobbles. Maybe today we can make history. Share this blog post and let’s see if we can make it findable on google. For that little girl who could not stop laughing about oobajubawobbles.

#oobajubawabbles