Seize openness

Yesterday morning I had this strong intuition to be open. I went to bed late and set my alarm to wake up early so I could go for a run. When my alarm went off the last thing I wanted to do was to strap on my running shoes. When 6 am rolled around somehow I was awake enough for my brain to start to think about things. When the brain starts going through items of the day it is hard to stop it, and hard to then roll over and go back for a small snooze.

So I got up.

As I slowly dressed for my run, I kept trying to talk myself out of it. “Don’t go. You will be too tired later. You did not get much sleep last night. Stay here, get some work done. Be slow.” The thing is I was mostly dressed and by then when you basically only have to put on your running shoes, why turn back? I went and it felt great. As I was running I had such a strong sense of urgency that I needed to be “open.” While I have hindsight to look back on, there was not some amazing revelation from my day, but there was a freeness I felt. Uninhibited.

I tried some new foods today. I got to know some work colleagues more. I did not go about my normal routine. I was open for what happened, and I seized the opportunities. I still have no idea why I had that strong intuition, but know that it will stay strong with me. I will think about it so that whatever opportunity comes before me today I will look at it differently. It is freeing really. Say yes to life. Be open to the opportunities. Jump on the adventures. In tiny, small, and big ways.

Hopefully you and I can both be more open today, tomorrow, and the day after that.

Being Open

I am as transparent as they come. I have mentioned before that a colleague calls me “TMI” instead of Tami. Well jokingly at least. If you know me you know that I have few filters and I have no problem telling you what is on my mind. It might mean I offend folks at times, but honestly at least you know where you stand with me. Right? Part of being transparent means you have to be open. The funny thing is that is not always the easiest thing for me.

Why? I am a planner. I like to think things through, have backup plans, and ensure that I will be prepared for whatever might occur. My childhood of disconnected utilities, no food on the table, and no money in the bank probably made me overzealous about ensuring that I would never have to worry about the lack of electricity, food on the table, and to make sure my family never lacked the basic necessities. Those moments were integral to my development and extremely poignant as to who and how I am today.

So when I found this Daily Om: “Softening and Expanding” it resonated with me. I think often about being open and how Chris and I talk about it extensively, but that does not make it easy to do in our day-to-day life. Whether you believe in God, a higher power, or the universe, I do believe that there is something at play in our daily life that directs our thoughts. Being open allows us to let go of what we really want, and gives us the space to ask, “How can I best bless? What do I need to do today to be present and listen for which conversations to take part in, and when should I speak up?” I truly believe there is something (whatever you may call it) guiding us for what we need to know. Here is the excerpt I wanted to share from the Daily Om:

“In order to get what we want in life, we have to be willing to receive it when it appears, and in order to do that we have to be open. Often we go through life with defenses we developed early on in order to protect ourselves. These defenses act as barriers, walls we needed at one time to feel safe, but that now serve to shut out desired influences, like intimacy or love. So an essential part of being receptive to what we want is to soften these barriers enough to let those things in when they show up.”

How do you react or allow yourself to be open? Are you receptive to the voices that tell us not to react, not to respond, or to jump for joy at an opportunity?

How we handle it matters.

There have been a few situations in the past few weeks that have irked me. Like being put in an uncomfortable situation where I had to take a stand for myself, where the other individuals were only thinking about themselves (or so it feels). Ever happen to you? I am sure it happens to all of us from time to time.

How we handle it is what matters most.

Do we react, get mad, get frustrated? Maybe. And that is okay. Do we show our true colors to the individuals that tick us off? Well, maybe. It depends. Can we do it with grace or do we add to the mix, stir the pot, and make the situation even worse? To me, making the situation worse shows our weakness. Instead, we should clearly and succinctly share where we are coming from and be transparent, open and honest. What gets me the most though is when others involved watch as by-standers never do anything. In some ways they could be accomplices to the situation and, by not taking a stand for us, they are no better than those that have wronged us. They shake their head and say, “Oh, it is just the way they are. There is no changing them.” What if (go with me for a second on this) they took a stand for us and said, “You are putting him in an awkward situation. This is not the way to treat them.”

I think of it often at work. I think of those on my team as part of my fold. I stick up for them and always keep their best interests in mind. I would not throw them to the wolves and hope they can fend for themselves. Yes, they must have strong skin and resilience, but I will not stand by and watch if they are put in awkward situations. I will see what I can do to help. The same is true for family and friends. Maybe others are not thinking of the situation they are putting others in and maybe I over think the situation I put others in. Either way, we could all be more conscious of how we treat others. Are we asking too much of them? Are we thinking about their situation? Are we asking of their time in ways that are not fair? Other people’s time is precious… do you care about it?

I do.