Make their day, make my day…

Posted by random olio

Have you ever thought about starting your day by thinking about how you might make someone else’s day? We go through our day going from meeting to meeting, or down a checklist of the many items we need to accomplish. Often we do not have time to think about getting lunch, let alone think about someone else and the full day we have ahead of us.

What would it look like, feel like, be like if you thought about how you might make another individual you encounter have a better day? What would you do? Instead of jumping right into your computer, emails, and meetings, might you ask a co-worker about their weekend? I often think that we get to work and start out on a hamster wheel, only to get out at 5, get into our car and drive home. Other days we might actually get out of our hamster wheel and truly focus and interact with others. On the days we get out of the hamster wheel, break routine, and engage and connect with those we see everyday we might just find that we see a glimmer of how we can be present for others.

I wonder if we started our day thinking of others, if the mood and focus would be different. We might rush less, breathe more, and appreciate our surroundings that much more. We could find that by thinking of others more, they think of us more. Like a boomerang effect of good will.

Are you with me?

A hot, sticky mess

Posted by random olio

We awoke to many loud popping sounds, almost like gunshots going off. It was the middle of the night. I sat up in bed, my heart pounding. What happened?

My parents, sister, brother, and I ran out of our bedrooms, down the hall, and into the kitchen to find out what had happened. We were shocked. The paneled walls in our dining room, the flowered border wallpaper, the olive green refrigerator, and the painted walls were covered in grape jelly.

A few days prior, we had visited my grandma’s house, and spent an afternoon picking grapes off the grapevines in her backyard. We did it every year. Our fingers purple hued with grape juice. I rarely popped one in my mouth as the tart taste was not my favorite. What I loved is what we would do when we brought our bounty home. Our kitchen turned into grape central. Massive pots brewing and stewing grapes and the counter lined with Ball jars ready for the final product. My mom mostly made grape jelly. Maybe there were other concoctions of grape canning or cooking, but I only remember the jelly. I loved and hated it all at once. It was a lot of work, but the result? Yummy grape jelly (my favorite) for breakfast!

So the grape covered walls? My mom had been canning the grape jelly and had not waited long enough for the grape jelly to cool before sealing the lids on top of the jars. In the middle of the night, the heat inside the jars had made them explode, leaving our kitchen and dining room splattered with grape jelly. It was a bit of a shock and funny all at the same time. The bummer part? My sister, brother, and I had to clean up the hot, sticky mess.

I think of it every time I smear grape jelly on my toast.

Shift

Posted by random olio

I felt off last night. Do you ever have those days when things do not feel right, you feel out of sorts, but for the life of you, you cannot figure out why? Sometimes when I am in that space, I can get cranky, and other times I just feel quiet and introspective. As I was stretching after my run, I pondered if something had happened in my day that might have led me to feel this way. No dice. Nothing came to me clearly. How was I going to get out of my funk? I had gone for a run which usually helped. No luck.

As I continued to stretch the thought came to me, maybe your funk has to do with what you are not focusing on. Hmm. Interesting concept. I then remembered the different conversations I had, ones about specific internal work politics, which can sometimes irk me. I could review all that junk with you, but I will not bore you with the details. What was cool about this post-run/stretch was that when I shifted my thoughts to what I had not been focusing on, I realized I was not directing my thoughts to the right parts of my day.

When I enter that window where I can see my thought shifting the word that always comes to me is: gratitude. It is always that instant ah-ha moment that reminds me I have been mulling over the crappy stuff. If I were to reflect on my day I would say that I was grateful to catch up on a ton of work that I had not had the opportunity to sit and focus on for days. Sometimes it is the smallest of things that can start us down the path to move us from grump to a smile.

If only every day, we could have the clarity of thought to flip a coin and look at the other side. We can have that clarity, but do we do it? Now I cannot tell you that after all that I felt 100%. Instead I think I started the shift internally. Sometimes you have to see how to change course, call it a day, sleep well, and start fresh the next day.

Happy holiday weekend to you!

Bend. Don’t break.

Posted by random olio

I can remember as a child going to the YWCA and taking acrobatics class, or we referred to it as “acro.” It was a basic tumbling class, and I am sure we were all completely out of sync for most of our routines. I have no idea if I had any talent, poise, or timing. Knowing what a klutz I am now, I probably was one of the girls that was out of line with the others. Maybe my sister remembers. In any case, from what I remember I had fun, and I loved the outfits we got to wear, should that tell you something?

Acro/tumbling classes help kids follow directions and be flexible. I wish my physical body was as flexible now as it was in those little tutu’s as a kid. The sky was the limit then, now I continue to do yoga to stretch and stay limber, but it is not the same. Instead of being physically flexible, I find that mental and emotional flexibility is much easier for me. Even when I may have a strong opinion on what I think an outcome should be in my life.

Recently I read this Daily Om called: “Exercising Flexibility” that made me ponder how flexible I am in life:

“When we are rigid or stuck in our ways, instead of adjusting to the world around us we hunker down, clinging to a concept of reality rather than reality itself. When we do this, we cut ourselves off from life, and we miss out on valuable opportunities, as well as a lot of joy.”

There are so many times when we do not have a choice, and maintaining flexibility is really the only answer. The ever-changing online landscape of the past few years has forced us to hone our flexibility. Why? Because things change faster than we can ever imagine. You might be 90% complete with a project at work, only to find out the scope has changed, your deadline stays the same, and you have to creatively figure out how to finish it on time. How do you do it? How do you not lose it? You have to let go of past habits, past history, and clear your thoughts in order to buckle down and change course.

Also from the Daily Om:

“When we are flexible, we allow for situations we could not have planned, and so the world continues to surprise and delight us.”

Sounds good to me!

Letter to my younger self

Posted by random olio

Have you ever written a letter to your younger self? If so, what did it say? If not, what would you have it say? I have done many team oriented exercises where you write a letter to your future self and then a certain number of days later it is put in the mail to you by someone else. What if instead you let yourself off the hook. What would you have told YOU at a younger age?

the bat is bigger than me…

Here is my letter to my younger self:

“If you could know one thing, it would be to tell you to play harder. You will have so much to overcome through high school, college, and beyond that you will exemplify an adult at a much younger age. If I could do anything to get you through those years it would be to find any and every moment to play. You will find that solace in children, and when your arms are full with the softness, simplicity, and wonder of the babies you will take care of for others. You will play with them, but it is not the childlike abandon you need to find within yourself.

You look to art to find that solace, to find the answers to your questions, and as therapy for what you are not able to control. Let it all go. You will have so much to balance later in life, that you might find it hard to let go and play. What you learn now about play, about laughter, about love will help to get you through tougher times. Without your playful resilience, you may crack.

It will all be okay. Times will be tough. Through loss, sickness, love, you will take care of many, and few will know how to take care of you. Let them. Do not always feel you have to be the strong one. Do not always think that no one will come through for you. Trust that those in our life will be there when you ask. In the end, it will all be better than you can ever imagine.

Have fun, play hard, and live in the moment.”