Tenacious Me

Posted by random olio

I have often been called tenacious. I never really liked it. I find it is a word that people do not really know the true meaning. Having a tenacious grip, a strong hold on something, not easily letting go or giving up. Yes, I would say that is me, but I always felt those definitions spun the word with a negative hint to it. That it meant you were more inflexible or strong-willed more than anything. So when I recently read Seth Godin’s 5 sentence blog post on tenacity and persistence, it was an eye-opening moment. He says:

“Tenacity is not the same as persistence. Persistence is doing something again and again until it works. It sounds like ‘pestering’ for a reason. Tenacity is using new data to make new decisions to find new pathways to find new ways to achieve a goal when the old ways didn’t work. Telemarketers are persistent, Nike is tenacious.”

It makes sense doesn’t it? Godin makes persistence almost sound like the definition of insanity (doing the same thing over and over again and expecting the same results). It makes me wonder, are we all actually more tenacious than we think? Has the word had a bad rap, or is it just me that has associated negative connotation to “tenacious?”

So often (as I mentioned in my blog on change last week) we get stuck in the rut of old ways and forget that each new project deserves a fresh look. It might not make sense to follow the same process anymore. It is always appropriate to ask yourself, are we doing this because it is the way it has always been done, or because we have not stopped to update and change? If the old way is not working, change it. If the newer ways are stale, change them. My old way of viewing tenacious has been changed. Check.

Appreciating my better half

Posted by random olio

I have not written about him directly in a few months, probably not since our anniversary, but I am inspired to tout my husband. His birthday is coming up, and it makes me stop and think about all the years we have been together, all that we have become, and all that we have accomplished. It makes me giddy thinking about it, but isn’t that the way it should be?

In many ways we are very similar, and yet we are so, so different. He is the calm to my fire, the balance to my scale, the voice of reason, the one you listen to when he speaks because he is not talking all the time.
Midnight snacks in no particular order: cereal or ice cream, or cereal and ice cream.
I lucked out that we have similar aesthetic tastes from wood floors, furniture, to the most important: artwork.
We both waver between being introverts and extroverts. Regardless, I love that we can have a badass time whether snuggling on our couch multi-tasking with our laptops and the DVR, or out for dinner with friends. It does not really matter what we are doing when we are together.
I found a boy who loves it most when I leave the house so he can clean (note: he really just likes to clean uninterrupted, he is not that passionate about vacuuming). We both agree that a clean and organized house leads to a balanced mind. When we feel at home in our home, we are truly able to relax. It is nice that those tendencies are common in both of us, and not something we struggle or have to agonize over.
I know that when we sleep in on the weekends, I will always have to get up first, he will always want to stay in bed, and the only way we will ever start our day is for me to sneak out of bed first.
He likes bourbon, chocolate, and cheese, oh and did I say bourbon?
He knows when I am at that tipping point between tired and exhausted, hungry and famished, and how to keep me from going to the other side.
Lastly, the boy has mad taste in women. I mean he picked me right?

Happy Birfday, Christopher.

Making Change Happen

Posted by random olio

I am a strong believer that if you go the extra mile, try a bit harder, and imagine big possibilities that you are on the path to shifting thought and making change. I do not like to keep things at the status quo. I like to push the envelope just a bit. Not too much that people cannot handle it, but just enough that hopefully we move others a bit closer to a better situation. It takes quite a bit of work, dedication, perseverance, and often a lot of push back to those that do not want to change. Oh, yes, and a lot of accountability.

How often do we stay in a job that does not challenge us because it is just easier to stay, because we are afraid to change things? I have been in that very situation, and I can tell you first hand, leaving was the best thing for me. It might sound cliché, but that change and my willingness to say okay life this is where things are at, bring it on, has led me to many, many opportunities, and tons and tons of cool people along the way. Individuals who challenge me, inspire me, comfort me, and make me laugh. They are in my life because my life changed.

Have you ever avoided having a conversation because it is easier? Tough conversations are exhausting, they zap us of energy, and often times make us want to run the other way. But we get through them, and each one changes us. Change often is swirling in my thought because it is a big part of the work I do each day. Helping others adapt to change, preparing them for change, and sustaining the change. So when Seth Godin’s blog on change called: “Every presentation worth doing has just one purpose” was finally reached in my inbox (I am so very behind on emails, blog reading, and the general news happening in the world), I thought, oh Seth you are speaking to my thoughts. He says: “A presentation that doesn’t seek to make change is a waste of time and energy.” I thought wow, if we only thought about that ALL the time, maybe our day-to-day meetings would be more engaging and inspiring.

I am going to try to approach my work in that way. How can I move the bar closer to success for others, closer to understanding their role, closer to having change stick? I usually try to approach projects thinking: what would success look like? But what if now I spend a bit of time before each presentation, and assess what change I might want to happen? How would I approach the presentation differently? Can I present in a way that means I will be able to plan what I need to do to get individuals to shift their thought?

I think we all can.

What you say and do matters

Posted by random olio

It can feel like what you do in a day probably does not make much of an impact on others. You go about your routine, doing similar things each day. Your reaction and response to most events makes you feel like it is the “same old, same old.” It hit me recently that whatever story we tell ourselves about our impact is most likely bullshit (well if we are talking ourselves down).

I see it all the time at work. A colleague takes an extra step and picks up the phone to handle a nasty customer (instead of emailing) sings to them, and generally adds cheer to their day. That leaves a lasting impact. You leave an impact each day, by not reacting, by sharing your thoughts and opinions in a meeting, by reaching out with love and care. It is hard to know you have left a mark, is it not? We do not get to be omniscient to find out where the seeds we share get planted. Sometimes a seed makes its way back to us and we can see that the day we spent extra time with someone, showed them that they matter. We just do not always know.

All of this made me start to think of keeping a mantra at the forefront of my thought. It sounds a bit self-centered, but hear me out. “I IMPACT.” Just that. If we remember that in everything we do we have an impact, we then realize that when we are nasty on the phone with a customer service agent we just left an impact on them and their day. I really have to remember that. There are times when I have had to call a company more than a dozen times to resolve an issue and by that thirteenth time I lose it (well honestly probably earlier than the thirteenth call). What if I got to a place that I never lose my cool? Why? Because we have an impact in everything we do.

If we remember “I IMPACT” then hopefully we leave those we encounter with a positive, cheerful, uplifting mood. Good and bad interactions create a lasting memory, but maybe we all should work a bit harder to leave the good memory. At the grocery store, at work, with our spouses, kids, and family. I know it may feel like a lot of pressure, but it is food for thought.

#iimpact

A makeover for him, a change of thought for me

Posted by random olio

Life is always full of surprises. At times there are moments that catch us off guard, and a shift happens in our thought. That happened to me after watching this video. A bit of background and some honest transparency. Portland has a high volume of homeless people. Over time it is very easy to be desensitized. After seeing individuals or families asking for money at many intersections you begin to stop seeing them, and honestly you begin to stop trusting that they really are homeless.

I remember living in a neighborhood in downtown Portland a few years ago. An elderly woman would always stand outside of Whole Foods and beg for money. She did not really look that homeless, more just old. She was persistent, and I began to wonder if she was really homeless. A long time later (after we moved to the burbs) I was talking with friends about that neighborhood, and this woman was discussed. A friend said they knew the older woman’s family, and she was not at all homeless. Does that explain the trust issue?

So when I saw this video transformation it brought tears to my eyes. It reminded me that regardless of trust, honesty, or our lot in life we are all still just people. We all still want to be loved, feel like we belong, and have a purpose. It has opened my thought to remember that regardless of what we have each been through, we all deserve to be treated with respect. We do not always know another’s story. While we do not always have to respond with money, we can respond with kindness, prayer, and maybe sometimes bring them food. I hope his transformation impacts you as much as it did me.