What is your money pledge?

Thank you, again, LearnVest. I have blogged before about LearnVest. This week one of their email newsletters mentioned the LearnVest pledge. While I really have no desire to participate in their LearnVest pledge, I do appreciate what they are trying to do. I guess I am not really into things like this that is sponsored by a massive corporation. Since LearnVest is doing it in connection with Chase, it makes me want to run the other way. Having said that, I love the idea of the LV pledge, and I do appreciate the pledge they have put together:

“I pledge to live my richest life, take control of my money, and be a source of support & inspiration for others striving for financial freedom.”

What would your money pledge be? I continue to work on my own money issues. I grew up poor for many years of my life, and spent a lot of time with my grandma. She grew up during the Depression so had quite a Depression mentality in regards to money. Spending so much time with her, and living with her for a few years, I think I took on some of her financial tendencies. When you grow up poor, and constantly watched your parents fight to just put food on the table, keep the electricity on, and the phone in service, it creates a feeling of lack. I am not sure I ever felt there was much of a surplus growing up. When I went to college and then began working after college, I still was often in debt. Whether it was credit card debt to pay for unexpected expenses, in addition to car and student loans, it often was hard to feel like there was ever extra that I could devote to an emergency fund or even to splurge for once.

Today I constantly look at purchases and money decisions in a way that would make you think I live in poverty. I am hard-core about how we spend our money and I think that is my way of trying to make sure I never end up in the situation I was in when I was young. So maybe I overcompensate for my past. Chris often has to get me to see that the decisions we are making are good, progressive, and that we can afford it. It is like he constantly has to bring me into the present. Based on my history with money and my Depression mentality, my money pledge would be more in the lines of:

“I pledge to free myself of the chains I feel around money. I can feel liberated while also making smart choices. As I let go of my past tendencies I hope to inspire and help others who also care about their financial future.”

What is your money pledge? Feel free to share in the comments section of this post if you feel so inclined!

Accountability

Accountability: the quality or state of being accountable; especially: an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one’s actions [Merriam-Webster Dictionary]

This is a topic that I have a strong passion about, and as an avid reader I have tried to find books on this topic that were engaging and I would want to read. It is a topic I think covers most aspects of our lives, whether at home, work, shopping, traveling, etc. However, I find it so lacking in the world. If we stand for honesty and integrity for what we believe in, and we follow through with those values, we are holding ourselves and hopefully in turn others accountable.

It is not that easy though. If it is hard for us to confront a family member regarding a specific situation that might make us uncomfortable, then we are not holding ourselves and those involved accountable. If we keep letting a friend off the hook and we start to feel they are abusing us, then we are not holding either individual accountable.

I finally found a book that has a chapter excerpt on accountability. It pertains to accountability with teams. The book is called: “The Advantage: Why Organizational Health Trumps Everything Else In Business” by Patrick Lencioni, he says:

“The irony of all this is that the only way for a team to develop a true culture of peer-to-peer accountability is for the leader to demonstrate that she is willing to confront difficult situations and hold people accountable herself. That’s right. The leader of the team, though not the primary source of accountability, will always be the ultimate arbiter of it. If she is reluctant to play that role–if she is a wuss who constantly balks when it’s time to call someone on their behavior or performance–then the rest of the team is not going to do their part. This makes sense. Why would a team member want to confront a colleague about an issue when the team leader isn’t willing to and is probably going to let them off the hook anyway?” (page: 56)

“At its core, accountability is about having the courage to confront someone about their deficiencies and then to stand in the moment and deal with their reaction, which may not be pleasant. It is a selfless act, one rooted in a word that I don’t use lightly in a business book: love. To hold someone accountable is to care about them enough to risk having them blame you for pointing out their deficiencies.” (page 57)

Wow. Never thought I would read that. Love. Caring enough about someone to call them out on their junk, their stuff, their baggage, even if it is uncomfortable. Are you setting goals for yourself and then not following through with them? Are you holding your team members and manager accountable?

Sometimes taking the harder road is the one that prompts us to grow. The tough route challenges us to look at life differently. Look at accountability in your life. Is it there? Are others holding you accountable? Are you holding others accountable?

Just something to mull over on your “hopefully” sunny Tuesday!

Children’s Book Week

Happy Monday! I had a good full weekend, with sunshine and warmth. It is supposed to be 79 degrees in Portland today. I think it will be the warmest day we have had since last summer! The forecast this week shows sun everyday this week, an exciting thing to look forward to when you live in rainy Portland!

So, this week is Children’s Book Week. Yes, I am addicted to reading and books. Books have changed my life. I was thinking back to the books I read as a child. I can remember sitting on the couch and reading aloud to my dad. Often our dog, Ginger, would lay on the couch with us.

tami, dad, and ginger reading together

(Apologies for the faded photo, it is what my physical copy looks like too).

The books I can remember reading aloud were Amelia Bedelia, most Beverly Cleary books, CorduroyAlexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day, Clifford, Where the Wild Things Are, Curious George, and many more. Later I would enjoy Encyclopedia BrownThe Babysitter’s Club, and Nancy Drew, among others.

Later in high school and college when I would babysit and work in a day care center, my favorite books to read to children were: Guess How Much I Love You, Love you Forever, You’re Just What I Need, The Paper Bag Princess, and one of my childhood favorites, The Poky Little Puppy.

What were your favorite childhood books?

In honor of children’s book week, give or send a child you know your favorite children’s book.

Have a great week!

Nostalgia: Garbage Pail Kids

I was a child in the 1980’s. One of the things I enjoyed (I think with lots of other kids of that era) were Garbage Pail Kids. I had not thought of them in ages until I came across them on this website. You can order an iPhone case in the Garbage Pail Kid of your choice. I hear the cards are also making a comeback.

I remember my grandma saying: “Seriously, Tami those cards are raunchy. Why would you spend your money on such filth?” (said with a flair of disdain for the choices I made). I always laughed. She did not get it. Although, I do not think I ever was truly enamored with these cards, I think it was just the rage at the time. You purchased them, collected them, traded them, and eventually lost interest. I have to admit, looking at them now many years later, they are creative, but yes raunchy and a bit pointless. If you think about it, a kid collects a baseball card, because of the talent, batting average, and amazing career of a specific athlete (for the most part). What amazing intrigue is there with a Garbage Pail Kid?

It even looks like folks are paying quite a lot for these ‘raunchy’ cards. Ebay lists 22,919 results when you search: Garbage Pail Kids. Shocking. Well I got a few chuckles out of myself as I scrolled through to remind myself of the different cards. Although I could not for the life of me remember any of them. I am surprised that kids today would find them remotely interesting. They have so many other toys and games to interest them and keep them constantly plugged into technology. Is it just the gross factor?

Ah well, I am done contemplating the future of Leaky Lindsay and Drippy Dan.

Happy weekend to all!

A Taxi Driver and Patience

I do not cry often. When I do it has to really hit me deep within. This story brought tears to my eyes. I am not sure if it is true, or how it originated, but nevertheless, it will touch you. It has been circulating around Facebook, so you might have read it already, but for those of you who have not, you are in for a treat. Here is the complete story. I have also copied it in its entirety here:

“A sweet lesson on patience. A NYC Taxi driver wrote. I arrived at the address and honked the horn. After waiting a few minutes I honked again. Since this was going to be my last ride of my shift I thought about just driving away, but instead I put the car in park and walked up to the door and knocked.. ‘Just a minute’, answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor.

After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 90’s stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940’s movie. By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets. There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.

‘Would you carry my bag out to the car?’ she said. I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman. She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb. She kept thanking me for my kindness. ‘It’s nothing’, I told her. ‘I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother to be treated.’ ‘Oh, you’re such a good boy, she said. When we got in the cab, she gave me an address and then asked, ‘Could you drive through downtown?’ ‘It’s not the shortest way,’ I answered quickly. ‘Oh, I don’t mind,’ she said. ‘I’m in no hurry. I’m on my way to a hospice.

I looked in the rear-view mirror. Her eyes were glistening. ‘I don’t have any family left,’ she continued in a soft voice.’The doctor says I don’t have very long.’ I quietly reached over and shut off the meter. ‘What route would you like me to take?’ I asked. For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator. We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl. Sometimes she’d ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.

As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, ‘I’m tired. Let’s go now’. We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico. Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move. They must have been expecting her. I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair. ‘How much do I owe you?’ She asked, reaching into her purse. ‘Nothing,’ I said. ‘You have to make a living,’ she answered. ‘There are other passengers,’ I responded. Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly.

‘You gave an old woman a little moment of joy,’ she said. ‘Thank you.’ I squeezed her hand, and then walked into the dim morning light. Behind me, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life. I didn’t pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk.What if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away? On a quick review, I don’t think that I have done anything more important in my life. We’re conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us unaware-beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.

I agree with the driver, and I am so glad they were not angry that day. This is my favorite take-away: “We’re conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us unaware-beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.” That is what brought tears to my eyes. To watch and be aware of those moments. The ones that make us better, more aware, and more alive.