I am in love.

I promise I will not change my blog from being about anything and everything, and entirely random, but for now my mind is on babies.

I am in love. Everyone tells you how much you will be in love and addicted to your own child. They tell you, and you hear it, but it does not really sink in until you hold that precious little baby. There is no way to bottle up that knowledge — it is something that has to be experienced. I can imagine what a lot of things would be like, but many have to be experienced and felt as they happen. I have also been told that not everyone falls in love and becomes attached to their child right away.

I will say that first hour of bonding after delivery was a bit of a blur. I could see him right in front of me but the way he was laying I could not see his face. And, I was exhausted. So utterly exhausted. So it is a blur. Sure I have pictures and a video, and I am grateful he was on me first before getting checked out and cleaned up. It is the hours and days that follow that make me a feisty momma bear. I would d0 absolutely anything for this boy.

If I were to start a business, it would be to bottle up that Nico baby smell. It feels like I go and burrow my head in his neck just to smell him. I want that smell never to go away. How is it that babies smell so good? I know that eventually he will smell like sweat, and dirt, but right now I do not want that baby smell ever to go away.

Now I have two boys that melt my heart. Chris. Nico.

Random Recipe: Apple Fries

Apples and bananas have been fruits that my pregnant belly has been wanting. Over the summer in the earlier part of my pregnancy I wanted berries (specifically blackberries and raspberries). Now that we are easing into fall and berries are no longer local, I have wanted apples. Over the holiday weekend we decided to try this Apple Fries recipe. They were definitely delicious, but in my opinion have two flaws. They take too much time to make than they are worth AND they made the house smell for days. That does not mean it will happen to you, but currently our range does not actually ventilate outside and thus the smell permeated throughout our house. We had to open windows and light candles for a few days to get rid of the apple fry smell.

Apple Fries with Vanilla Whipped Cream 
Adapted from The Veg Life

  • Canola Oil (high-heat oil)
  • 2 large Granny Smith Apples, peeled and sliced into wedges
  • ¼ cup Cornstarch

Cinnamon Sugar Topping:

  • ¼ cup sugar
  • 1 Tablespoon cinnamon

Dip:

  • ½ cup heavy whipping cream
  • 1 teaspoon Vanilla Extract

Instructions:

  1. Mix the cinnamon and sugar in a small bowl and set aside.
  2. Heat enough oil to cover the bottom of your pan on high heat.
  3. Toss apple wedges in cornstarch, coating both sides.
  4. Place just enough of the coated apple wedges into the hot oil to make a single layer and fry on each side for 2 to 3 minutes. They should be just golden brown. Repeat with the rest of the apple wedges.
  5. Transfer the cooked apples onto a cookie sheet lined with paper towels and drain for a few minutes.
  6. Toss in the cinnamon sugar mixture and serve.
  7. Whip the heavy cream and vanilla to use as a dip. Yum!

Random recipe: Cinnamon Roll Cups

Sometimes you need an easy recipe to make and devour. My favorite part about this recipe is how easy it is, but also how it made the house smell so good. The moment that they started baking in the oven the smell filled the house. I am a bit addicted to cinnamon and anything with that warm spice, such as chai, cloves, pumpkin pie spice, oh and nutmeg.

This recipe from Mix and Match Mama’s blog – for Cinnamon Roll Cups. Since I did not have time to get approval to post the entirety of the recipe from her blog, you will have to click the link to read the full post. Just know you will need a few basic ingredients and a can of refrigerated biscuits. It makes 12 muffin sized cinnamon roll cups. Much easier than using yeast when you quickly want that cinnamon roll goodness.

Although I did tell Chris that they are very close to just purchasing the cinnamon roll refrigerated can. Much better, but similar. Will we make them again? Maybe. Total time to make is about 20 minutes. You just have to make sure you have cream cheese (for the frosting) and a can of refrigerated biscuits on hand. While they were baking you can make the frosting.

They are an easy dessert, midnight snack, or breakfast treat. Enjoy!

Unique and Findable

This Sunday is Mother’s Day. Each year it feels like just another day to me. I think of my mom and grandma and it makes me sad, and then that just feels like a waste of time. Last year and again this year I think about my sister and how much she loves motherhood (well most of the time I think). I love watching her with Charlie. It is like she has settled into herself in a way that feels almost impossible to explain. It suits her. Her admiration for that little bambino is awe-inspiring to watch, and she always has Charlie’s best interest in mind.

Last week I saw the most precious video on motherhood, and wanted to share for all those moms, grandmas, and sisters who mother. It is a video that shows that we are all truly unique, whether it is our smell, skin, or hair. Somehow these little ones know what is important. Even blindfolded they know what home means, they know who their mother is, and watching it unfold is priceless.

Make sure to tell your mom or grandma or sister how much they mean to you this Sunday (or every day). If you are nearby touch their skin and hair, make physical contact and connect with them in a deep way. You might not be three years old, but I am sure they will feel just as honored as these mothers did…

 

Tears, teeth, and that smell

Yesterday I had a dentist appointment. It was a rough day in all ways. We got some not so fun news this week, Chris was traveling, a not so fun day at work, the list goes on. I will not bore you with the details. I am in the dentist chair getting my teeth cleaned, exhausted and almost falling asleep. I keep smelling something that feels familiar and realize it is my hygienist. I told her I was having a rough day and she was great, just kept quiet and did not talk too much. In turn it allowed me to be quiet.

Behind the big green glasses they give you to block their bright light, I felt tears come to my eyes. I had just spoken to my sister on my drive over to the dentist office. The smell reminded me of something from my past which in turn made me think of my mom, thus the tears. I was having one of those “I miss my mom moments” while my head was lower than my feet in the dentist chair. “Seriously?” I am thinking. “I have tears in my eyes at the dentist?” Most likely the emotions surrounding all the events of the past few days are bringing the water works, but did it have to be at the dentist?

No one noticed. Funny how I truly hate going to the dentist, and yet at this moment of cleansing, when they scrape, floss the crap out of your gums, and prod in your mouth, that it was the hour in my day that I needed to just let go, and hide behind the green glasses under the bright light. It always amazes me how the littlest smell can set off emotions in your body, bring back memories from childhood, and make you miss someone who has been gone for 20 years. I was having a day where I wanted to curl in a ball, scream and yell, throw a tantrum, and have my mom tell me it was all going to be alright.

My sister consoled me, Chris later consoled me, but sometimes all you want is your mom. Life is real and raw and painful sometimes. People let us down. We move on, we grow thicker skin, and somehow we make it through it all. Sometimes though we just want our mom to tell us that we did all we could do, and that we are going to be alright. I am looking forward to a new day full of opportunities to be quiet and listen, dance and run, and snuggle and hold those that are dear close to me.

Oh, and I have clean teeth now.